“Don’t raise your voice, improve your argument.”

—Desmond Tutu, South African Anglican cleric and human rights activist

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How often do you find yourself in an argument in your personal or professional world? They say the best way to win arguments is to avoid them. Beyond that, here are a few nuggets of wisdom from an article by Paul Sloane to consider:

  1. Stay calm and keep your cool or you will lose.
  2. Use facts as evidence for your position.
  3. Be curious rather than furious. Although this is similar to point one, questions can help you stay in control of the conversation, by making your opponent scramble for answers, and challenge their points.
  4. Listen carefully and be prepared to concede a good point.
  5. Appeal to your opponent’s higher values to go beyond logic. Use a little emotion by appealing to worthy motives that are hard to disagree with.

EXERCISE:

Check out Paul Sloane’s article How to Win an Argument — Do’s, Don’ts, and Sneaky Tactics

Please also check out these books to expand your communication mastery even further:

Fierce Conversations by Susan Scott
Crucial Conversations and Crucial Confrontations by Kerry Patterson