A Continuous Part of Life

Posted on February 17, 2015 by Barry

“Education is not something to prepare you for life; it is a continuous part of life.”

—Henry Ford, American industrialist

Photo from Flickr by CODnewsroom

When you completed your formal education – whether it was grade school, high school, college or an advanced degree – how prepared were you for the professional and personal roles you have today?

Henry Ford knew as well as anyone that our education depends significantly on the continuous, iterative lessons we learn through life experiences. This form of education puts us to the test before we capture the lessons we need to live successful lives.

EXERCISE:

When and in what ways can you embrace the idea that lifelong learning, and being a continuous work in progress, is the best form of education to prepare you for your future?

“I always wondered why…”

Posted on February 16, 2015 by Barry

“I always wondered why somebody didn’t do something about that. And then I realized I was somebody.”

—Lilly Tomlin, American Actress

Photo from Flickr by Nomadic Lass

Do you have pet peeves, things that annoy you or drive you to distraction? Most people do.

One of mine is litter. I notice it most often when I’m leaving a movie theater and see empty cups and popcorn containers strewn about, and in the parking lot of the gym I visit every morning.

Some years ago, I noticed myself complaining about litter fairly often, without my complaints making any difference whatsoever. That day, I promised myself that if I came across an empty water bottle or other not-too-nasty litter, I would pick it up with a plastic bag and place it in the trash.

EXERCISE:

Although picking up a single piece of litter is hardly going to alter the environmental challenges we face, what do you think might happen if you and seven billion other “somebodies” took initiative on the issues you/they assumed were meant for someone else?

“Liberate yourself from the need to be right.”

Posted on February 13, 2015 by Barry

“Liberate yourself from the need to be right.”

-Seth Godin, in “Unleashing the Ideavirus”

Photo from Flickr by Jamison Wieser

Have you ever been in a prison? I hope not. Freedom, and the desire for it, is a fundamental value shared by people throughout the world. Unfortunately, many of us are trapped to some degree in self-generated prisons.

In today’s quote, Seth Godin says the need to be right, and thus making others wrong, imprisons us in a world of judgement and dysfunctional relationships at work, at home, and within our communities. You’ve probably heard the phrases, “Dead Right,” or “Dead Wrong” applied to people in your world. Just watch the evening news to see how this thinking has generated some of the domestic and global issues facing us today.

What I observe personally and professionally is that these behaviors exact a very high price in our relationships and our organizations.

EXERCISE:

Consider the following questions as you go through your day, with the intent of liberating yourself from the insatiable need to be “right”:

What is my inner voice saying about the situation I’m facing?
Are my thoughts supportive or critical?
How open and receptive am I to what others are saying?
What value or goodness can I find in their words?

By diligently applying this exercise, and agreeing to bring these practices to others in your world, you can virtually guarantee yourself a new level of life satisfaction.

“Eating an artichoke is like…”

Posted on February 12, 2015 by Barry

“Eating an artichoke is like getting to know someone really well.”

—Willi Hastings (attributed)

Photo from Flickr by sterotyp_0815

I have never prepared or eaten an entire artichoke, only the hearts from a can or those marinated in a jar.

Hasting’s statement peaked my curiosity and I wondered, “How difficult could this be?” If you are like me, you simply go to your favorite search engine and query the universe.

I learned that there is an eleven-step process to preparing and eating an artichoke. If the process is not followed closely, you could experience considerable digestive challenges, and problems with your garbage disposal as well.

How is eating an artichoke like getting to know someone really well? If you truly wish to get to the heart of another and develop a close, quality relationship, it takes time, patience, care, and attention to detail.

EXERCISE:

Examine the relationships you hope to make or take to a new level, professionally or personally. How would a patient and somewhat methodical approach yield the lasting, substantial relationships you desire?

“It’s not that I’m so smart; it’s just that… ”

Posted on February 11, 2015 by Barry

“It’s not that I’m so smart; it’s just that I stay with problems longer.”

-Albert Einstein

Illustration from Flickr by donkeyhotey

Albert Einstein has a fan club. He was launched into international super stardom when Arthur Eddington’s work confirmed his General Theory of Relativity, which eventually brought him the Nobel Prize in Physics.

Einstein’s name has become synonymous with genius, and in 1999 Time Magazine recognized him the “Person of the Century.”

Applications of his theories are seen in daily use in such devices as the television, remote control devices, automatic door openers, laser technology, and DVD players.

Einstein attributed much of his success to good old hard work and sticking with problems far longer than most people.

EXERCISE:

Where would sticking with a current problem or challenge longer than you normally would help you discover and realize your own genius?

“Teaching others scales right back to us.”

Posted on February 10, 2015 by Barry

“Teaching others scales right back to us.”

—Seth Godin, Author

Photo from Flickr by winnifredxoxo

I have always had a passion for learning. As a child, I remember vividly my mother coming upstairs to read after our evening meal and some family time. Although she had only a high school education, she had the most expansive vocabulary of anyone I knew.

My own family, and my wife’s, were educators, so it was not surprising that my first career was as a teacher. After a few years, I shifted to business and found myself in teaching roles within the company. For the past 22 years, I have continued to be both student and teacher as I pursue my professional efforts as a coach.

Over the years, I’ve learned by watching others, applying what I’ve learned, and learned the most by sharing what I learned with others. The lessons always scaled back to me with even deeper meaning and impact.

EXERCISE:

How can you learn what you most desire by watching people you admire, practice what you learn, and scale these lessons back to you even more by teaching others in your professional and personal life?

As Seth Godin said in his latest book, What to Do When It’s Your Turn, “Teaching rewards us all.”

“It’s time to make the donuts!”

Posted on February 9, 2015 by Barry

“It’s Time to Make the Donuts!”

—Dunkin Donuts

Photo from Flickr by Paehder

Readers of The Quotable Coach frequently ask me where I find the quotes. Beyond sites such as brainyquote.com, quotation apps, and the books I read, I often receive quotes, proverbs, and some just plain cool sayings from friends and colleagues.

Today, one of my friends from the health club notice that I was leaving about a half hour earlier than my usual time. He nonchalantly said, “It must be time to make the donuts!,” which is a branding phrase from Dunkin Donuts here in the United States.

The two take-aways for me in hearing this phrase were that I was up earlier than usual to get a start on my day, and that I had an important purpose to fulfill.

EXERCISE:

What important professional or personal project would have you wake up a bit earlier, get a jump on your day, and make some “delicious donuts” of your own?

“Most people do not listen with…”

Posted on February 6, 2015 by Barry

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”

—Stephen Covey, American educator, author, businessman, and keynote speaker

Photo from Flickr by Webbstjarnan.SE

Rate yourself on a scale from one to ten, with “one” being very poor and “ten” being outstanding, with regard to your mastery of Stephen Covey’s 5th Habit of Highly Effective People:

First Seek to Understand, then to be Understood

Consider reducing your score by one point if you:

Pretend to listen
Selectively hear only certain parts of the conversation
Miss the meaning of what the person is saying
Listen with the intent to reply
Filter what is being said through your own life experiences and frame of reference
Prematurely decide if what is being said has value, before the speaker has finished

The behaviors listed above are often called autobiographical listening.

EXERCISE:

To gain true and deep understanding of another required empathetic listening. Add points to your score if you:

Give the speaker your undivided attention
Are open-minded and nonjudgmental
Observe and sense the emotions behind the words being used
Are quiet and allow some time for the other person to fully express their view. Open-ended questions may be helpful here to make sure you gain the full depth of their viewpoint
Follow clarifying questions with attempts to restate what you believe they said

“If you want your children to…”

Posted on February 5, 2015 by Barry

“If you want your children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders.”

—Abigail van Buren, American “Dear Abby” advice columnist

Photo from Flickr by thetaxhaven

As one born in the middle of the Baby Boom, I find it very interesting to discuss with colleagues and friends the attitudes and general work ethics of the various generations currently in the workforce.

Although there are benefits to all points of view and perspectives, this quote from “Dear Abby” (whose real name was Pauline Esther Phillips) is a good piece of wisdom and coaching for parents, and for business professionals bringing in the next generation of workers.

EXERCISE:

Examine your own developmental journey, personally and professionally. When has assuming personal responsibility, or having it placed on you by a parent, mentor, or organizational leader helped you become a more grounded person?

“Man is a genius when he is dreaming.”

Posted on February 4, 2015 by Barry

“Man is a genius when he is dreaming.”

—Akira Kurosawa, 20th Century Japanese Filmmaker

Image from amazon.com

I am currently reading The Big Idea – How Breakthroughs of the Past Shape the Future , compiled by National Geographic. This visually stunning and well-organized manuscript explores some of the big ideas and big thinkers of the past and the present, who are shaping our present and future.

If you have an interest in health and medicine, transportation and space exploration, information and communication, biology and the environment, chemistry and material, physics, or the cosmos, this book is a gem!

EXERCISE:

What are your dreams for your professional or personal life, or for that matter, the world? How can you realize these dreams by tapping into the big ideas of others and capturing more of your inner genius?