“Happiness held is the seed; happiness shared is the flower.”

“Happiness held is the seed; happiness shared is the flower.”

—John Harrigan, writer, director and performer

Image from Unsplash by Yuriy Garnaev

Did you know that Norway is considered one of the happiest places on the planet? The CNN special Chasing Life, hosted by Dr. Sanji Gupta, recently highlighted a small town 200 miles north of the Arctic Circle.

Despite the frigid temperatures and the complete darkness November through January, most people interviewed described themselves as a 9 or 10 on the Happiness Scale.

A critical component to their happiness was the focus on the level of family and community engagement.

In Norway, after the birth of a child, a parent receives 80% of their wages and a full year off of work to focus on raising the child. If they choose to take off only ten months, they receive 100% of their wages.

EXERCISE:

Where can and will you plant the seeds of happiness in your community gardens, so that you can share the flowers of happiness with those you care about and love?

Don’t stop when you are tired. Stop when you are done

“Don’t stop when you are tired. Stop when you are done.”

—David Goggins, American ultramarathon runner

image of David Goggins running

Image of David Goggins from Madbarz

A job well done is a wonderful phrase, whether said by us, or a respected colleague.
The power and satisfaction of completing something big or small has a way of releasing lots of those “feel good” hormones associated with happiness, pleasure, and overall life satisfaction.

On the other hand, consider all those half-done, in-process projects in either your personal or professional worlds – especially the ones that don’t quite light you up with enthusiasm. What emotions and feelings are associated with these matters? How often do you stop your efforts due to some level of fatigue or frustration, or perhaps procrastinate and decide to get back to these efforts later rather than sooner?

EXERCISE:

Where and on what priority matter could you use the experience of being tired as a trigger or catalyst to dig deeper into your own grit and persistence to “get’er done”?

One of life’s small pleasures is to return something to its proper place

“One of life’s small pleasures is to return something to its proper place.”

—Gretchen Rubin, American author and speaker

Image of tools properly aligned

Image from Unsplash by Florian Klauer

I am an Amazon Prime subscriber. One of my most common purchases, as you may know from reading The Quotable Coach blog, is books.

One of the criteria I use to confirm my instincts about a purchase is the number of high review scores on Amazon.

To receive over one hundred is respectable; over 500 is quite significant. To have over 1,000 is remarkable given the abundance of books and our reasonably short span of interest.

The book, “The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing” has over 13,000 reviews. Over 80% of them are four or five star ratings. They must be on to something!

EXERCISE:

Where and in what ways could bringing a bit more order into your world increase your life satisfaction and happiness? Of course, please investigate the excellent work by Gretchen Rubin, including The Happiness Project, which has over 1,600 reviews, of which 79% are four or five stars.

 

Will you look back on life and say

“Will you look back on life and say, ’I wish I had,’ or ‘I’m glad I did’?”

—Zig Ziglar, late American author, salesman, and motivational speaker

What percent of the day does the average person seem content, happy, or even joyful? Alternatively, what percent of the day do they go through the motions, feel stuck, or experience regret?

Where do you fit on this spectrum of feelings, day-to-day, week-to-week, or even year-to-year?

Someone once shared the thought that life is a bit like a toilet paper roll. The more life sheets you use, the faster it spins.

EXERCISE:

What steps can and will you take at this point in your life to have many more “I’m glad I did” moments in the years ahead?

My daughter Rachel suggested a wonderful book related to this topic, titled A Million Miles in a Thousand Years – How I Learned to Live a Better Story, by Donald Miller.

Contentment Makes Poor Men Rich

“Contentment makes poor men rich. Discontent makes rich men poor.”

—Benjamin Franklin, American Founding Father

Image of Benjamin Franklin

Image from prachnhachivit.com

Did you know that for over 50 years the citizens in many countries have become wealthier with no increase, and often a decrease, in their levels of happiness?

There is increasing evidence that the effect of income on life satisfaction seems to be transient, with many people seeking the next fix. Perhaps one of the most disturbing examples of this is the phenomenon of hoarding.

Being content, as today’s quote suggests, describes wealth through emotional criteria rather than material criteria.

It is our attitude about who we are and what we have that frames our views on life.

EXERCISE:

Consider exploring the work of Clayton M. Christensen, who wrote the book, How Will You Measure Your Life?

 

Doing what you like is freedom

“Doing what you like is freedom. Liking what you do is happiness.”

—Frank Tyger, late American Editorial Cartoonist and Humorist

Image of an elderly couple sitting on a bench

Image from Unsplash by Matthew Bennett

I am often asked by my contemporaries when I plan to retire. I’ve been coaching for 26 years, and find myself only a handful of years away from collecting Social Security and qualifying for Medicare. I love what I do. The idea of a traditional retirement has very little appeal.

I have, however, observed many people my age pining for the freedom to do their own thing and escape the daily grind of “working for the man,” or simply not enjoying their vocations.

Upon retirement, some individuals find their freedom isn’t always associated with the happiness they expected.

EXERCISE:

As you pursue your personal and professional objectives and purpose, how can you find freedom and happiness by doing more of what you like, and liking more of what you do?

Talents and Deep Gladness

“At what point do my talents and deep gladness meet the world’s deep need?”

Frederick Buechner, American writer & theologian

Aerial view of tropical rainforest with converging rivers, Guyana

Image from thefatherhoodcomission

Imagine two great rivers flowing from their source high in the mountains, where ice and snow melt into the purest waters possible. The names of these rivers happen to be “My Talents,” and “Deep Gladness.”

Many miles away, where the two rivers converge, is the ocean of “What the world needs most,” and the resulting delta could be the Island of Happiness, Fulfillment, and Life Purpose.

EXERCISE:

Where and how can you best channel the naturally flowing aspects of your talents and deep gladness to generously contribute to the world’s deepest needs?

Real Happiness is Cheap Enough

“Real happiness is cheap enough, yet how dearly we pay for its counterfeit.”

—Hosea Ballou, 19th Century American Theologian

Image of book cover "Happier"

In his 2007 book, Happier, Tal Ben Shahar, PhD, introduces us to different archetypes people commonly pursue in their “Happiness Journey.” They include:

The Hedonism Archetype, in which people pursue present pleasure and often experience future detriment.

The Rat Racer Archetype subordinates the present to the future, suffering now for the purpose of some anticipated future gain.

The Happiness Archetype finds enjoyment in their present efforts (i.e. the journey) while also knowing it will lead them to a fulfilling future.

EXERCISE:

What no-cost or low-cost activities, rituals, or daily behaviors provide you with enjoyment and pleasure, while serving you in realizing your personal and professional goals?

How can and will you insert more of these activities into every day, to lead a far happier life?

Happiness is When What you Think

“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”

—Mahatma Gandhi, 20th Century Indian Activist

Throughout my professional life, I have learned from personal growth and development thought leaders that, “Thoughts Become Things.”

As Wayne Dyer conveyed in his book Manifest Your Destiny, we all have the ability to influence and create our world through our thoughts, words, and actions.

EXERCISE:

Where and how can and will you harmonize your thoughts, words, and actions to manifest greater happiness in your world?

Another one of my favorite Wayne Dyer books on this subject is The Power of Intention.

 

The Greatest Source of Happiness

“Satisfaction of one’s curiosity is one of the greatest sources of happiness in life.”

—Linus Pauling, 20th Century American Chemist and Author

Image of a boy curiosity

Image from Flickr by Mohammad Abdullah

Rate yourself from one (low) to ten (high) as to your general level of curiosity.

Virtually everyone I ask to do this exercise places themselves in the six to ten range. A few even go beyond ten, to see what happens when they break the rules.

We humans are seekers, always looking around the corner or over the hill to discover what lies beyond our own knowledge and view of the world.

Consider our historic and current explorers.

Examine the risks we as a species have been willing to take to feed this craving, the boost of dopamine, and the feeling of happiness it provides.

EXERCISE:

Where and how can you boost your happiness index by becoming a more curious explorer?

Please reply to this post with the actions you plan to take.