Category Archives: Attitude

“We learn nothing by being right.”

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“We learn nothing by being right.”

—Elizabeth, Princess Bibesco, 20th Century English socialite, actress and writer

Image from Unsplash by Robert Ruggiero

When was the last time you had a discussion in which the phrase “I know” was voiced by yourself or the other person?

How often does this phrase show up during a typical day at work or home?

When you hear these words, consider translating them into “I’ve stopped listening.”

Being right and making others wrong not only damages relationships, it also shuts down the potential of learning anything new.

EXERCISE:

Where would embracing a healthy dose of uncertainty and a more open mind improve your relationships and keep your wheels of wisdom turning?

A cloudy day is no match for a sunny disposition

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“A cloudy day is no match for a sunny disposition.”

—William Arthur Ward, 20th Century American motivational writer

Image from Unsplash by bruce mars

A few days after the Labor Day holiday our outdoor community pool closed for the season. Although I like to think of Autumn as the season where every leaf is a flower, many of our local residents begin hibernating or flying south.

I like the idea of wherever you go, there you are, in which case we can actually take our attitudinal weather wherever we go.

Who are the happy, peppy people in your life?

Who are the individuals who are constantly walking around under a dark cloud of their own making?

What type of person are you?

EXERCISE:

What attitude adjustments can and will you bring into the fall and winter seasons?

How can a sunnier disposition brighten the months ahead for everyone in your various communities?

People may hear your words but they feel your attitude

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“People may hear your words, but they feel your attitude.”

—John Maxwell, New York Times bestselling author, coach and speaker

Image from Unsplash by Frame Harris

In many ways all living things—including ourselves—are like machines.

We run on fuel and generate billions of electrical impulses each second. Even when we examine ourselves on an atomic level, electric and magnetic fields are constantly flowing.

When two particles—and in the case of today’s quote two people—interact, the energy fields between them can fluctuate.

Words alone compared to words with a positive attitude can be felt, and an experience of alignment and resonance can be experienced.

EXERCISE:

How and in what ways can and do you generate the feelings of excitement and engagement in others?

How do the people you know use their positive attitudes to offer you their magnetic personalities to engage your deepest listening?

Slow movements help slow the mind

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“Slow movements help slow the mind, so it can enjoy its reunion with the body.”

—Therese Jornlin, therapist and transformational coach

Image from Unsplash by Jose Vazquez

Over the past several months, I’ve added the CALM app’s “daily move” to my morning routine. With the years adding up, I’ve found these 5-7 minute exercises helpful in soothing my creaky joints and  muscles.

Many of the movements — based on  yoga, Tai Chi, and Qi Gong — have helped me enter my day with greater energy and focus.

EXERCISE:

Where and how could you include various forms of slow movement to your day and benefit from the reunion of your mind and body?

Consider trying CALM‘s daily move for yourself and let me know what you think.

Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness.  Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing.

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“Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing.”

—August Wilson, 20th Century American Playwright

Image from Unsplash by Benjamin Davies

Consider the following statement on a one-to-five scale in which one is absolutely not and five is definitely yes.

I have a clear view of where I am and where I am going in my life.

This statement is part of my discovery process to help determine a potential client’s readiness to move their lives forward with a supportive coaching relationship.

For optimal success, these relationships benefit significantly through the deep and thoughtful process of examining and wrestling with their limiting beliefs and habits. Through careful illumination and generous self-forgiveness, each individual will most likely realize far more of their fullest personal and professional potential.

EXERCISE:

What steps can and will you take to more fully examine your own demons to help your angels sing? Consider picking up a copy of the book Taming your Gremlins by Rick Carson as a way to open this door of deeper discovery.

To explore your own readiness for coaching, please consider filling out my free Coaching Readiness Assessment.

You cannot have a beautiful life if you always focus on ugliness in others

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“You cannot have a beautiful life if you always focus on ugliness in others.”

—Debasish Mridha, M.D. physician, writer, philosopher, and philanthropist

Image from Unsplash by Sebastian Herrmann

How much beauty do you see and experience on a typical day? How much ugliness are you observing in your personal and professional communities?

A colleague who happens to be a lawyer recently shared considerable frustration and general unhappiness with the dog-eat-dog, fight-fire-with-fire approach to much of their work, stating that work has become increasingly ugly and that waking each morning to do more of it with no end in sight is crushing their soul.

EXERCISE:

Where and how can you seek and find more beauty in the people around you?

What shifts in perspective and behavior can you offer others so that they, too, can have a more beautiful life?

“If you want light to come into your life, you need to stand where it is shining.”

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“If you want light to come into your life, you need to stand where it is shining.”

—Guy Finley, American self-help writer

Image from Unsplash by Elisa Coluccia

In the northern hemisphere we are headed into winter with both colder temperatures and shorter hours of sunlight. During these months many of us hibernate a bit and the reduced sunlight can often influence our emotions and moods.

What strategies have you tried or seen others use to stand where the light is shining? What approaches beyond bringing more natural lighting sources into your home or going south like migratory birds might help you maintain a sunnier disposition?

EXERCISE:

Create a list of your closest relationships and communities. How can you make an extra effort to spend more time with these individuals and groups to boost your levels of vitamin D3 all year round?

Friday Review: Attitude

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Friday Review: Attitude

What role does attitude play in your life? Here are a few related posts you may have missed.

 

“It’s hard to see a halo when you’re looking for horns.”

 

 

 

“If you are not willing to learn no one can help you. If you are determined to learn, no one can stop you.”

 

 

“To some this may look like a sunset. But it’s a new dawn.”

 

 

 

“What can you smile about today?”

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“What can you smile about today?”

—Calm app Reflection

Barry and Weston

In late August, Wendy and I had the opportunity to watch our three-year-old grandson Weston for four days. We found it pretty hard to believe that we actually raised two adults—now 36 and 34—given our frequent need to nap when Weston did!

Along with puzzles, toys cars, reading books, and finding clever ways to avoid going to bed, Weston’s favorite toy is Play Doh. Over the years, he has assembled quite a collection of colors, and the other day he had the great idea of mixing them all together.

Being a serious guy, I was sure this was not appropriate. I insisted that he keep the colors separate, which made both Weston and my wife pretty upset.

Upon reflection, I realized that what mattered was the big smile this process brought to his little face, and not the grumpy, rigid method I was holding on to.

EXERCISE:

What brings a smile to your face?

Take a look at the grins of those you love and consider those smiles even more important than your own.

What can and will you do to bring even more miles of smiles to your world?

“Never bear more than one trouble at a time. Some people bear three kinds — all they have had, all they have now, and all they expect to have.”

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“Never bear more than one trouble at a time. Some people bear three kinds — all they have had, all they have now, and all they expect to have.”

—Edward Everett Hale, 19th Century American author and historian

Image from Unsplash by Antoine Dautry

If you are a negative, half-empty, or pessimistic individual, you may wish to practice your subtraction or division to improve your life. If you lean more strongly toward the positive, half-full, or optimistic scale, consider your addition and multiplication skills.

Many of us travel through time via various mental pathways from the past, to the present, and often into the future. If you happen to be in the half-empty camp, your troubles can easily add up and multiply beyond those present in the moment.

Using your mental muscles, selecting only one trouble at a time on your current doorstep can reduce your worries and lift the load more easily.

EXERCISE:

For the optimists among you who sees opportunities in most obstacles, feel free to add, multiply, and embrace as many possibilities as you wish.