How could you stop being your worst enemy and become your own greatest ally?

How could you stop being your worst enemy and become your own greatest ally?

—Inspired by a post by Bernadette Jiwa, Best Selling Irish-Australian Author

Image from Unsplash by Ava Sol

Most people fight themselves more fiercely than any external obstacle.

The turning point begins with noticing that inner voice: is it guiding or sabotaging?

Instead of silencing it, retrain it. Speak to yourself as you would to someone you are responsible for growing — honest, but not cruel.

Build small agreements with yourself and keep them. Trust is earned internally the same way it is externally.

Replace perfection with progress, and criticism with curiosity.

When you fail, study rather than shame.

Over time, you shift from opposition to alignment. You stop wasting energy on self-conflict and start investing it in self-support.

That is the quiet moment you become your own ally, and everything begins to change from the inside out.

EXERCISE:

Spend 2 minutes a day writing down your most common self-criticisms, then rewrite each one as advice you would give to a friend.

This simple shift helps you catch the patterns that quietly keep you stuck and replaces them with more accurate, hopeful language.

Fight for the things that you care about

“Fight for the things that you care about, but do it in a way that will lead others to join you.”

Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Late Associate Justice of the Supreme Court

Image from Unsplash by Galen Crout

What causes do you care about the most? How do they line up and align with your core values and beliefs? To what degree do people in your various communities know what causes you support?

Early in my professional career one of my more senior colleagues introduced me to a quick and easy-to-remember lesson on leadership.

His nugget of wisdom was to always speak about what you stand for versus what you oppose. Being positive and less oppositional is clearly a better approach to finding areas of alignment and agreement.

EXERCISE:

What are some of your best ways to have people join you in the causes you care about the most?

How can you more successfully take a stand without stepping on too many toes?

People may hear your words but they feel your attitude

“People may hear your words, but they feel your attitude.”

John Maxwell, New York Times bestselling author, coach and speaker

Image from Unsplash by Frame Harris

In many ways all living things—including ourselves—are like machines.

We run on fuel and generate billions of electrical impulses each second. Even when we examine ourselves on an atomic level, electric and magnetic fields are constantly flowing.

When two particles—and in the case of today’s quote two people—interact, the energy fields between them can fluctuate.

Words alone compared to words with a positive attitude can be felt, and an experience of alignment and resonance can be experienced.

EXERCISE:

How and in what ways can and do you generate the feelings of excitement and engagement in others?

How do the people you know use their positive attitudes to offer you their magnetic personalities to engage your deepest listening?

Walk Your Talk

“You cannot talk your way out of something you behaved yourself into.”

—Stephen Covey, American self-help author

Image from nxtlvlc.com

Image from nxtlvlc.com

Actions speak louder than words. They are all we really have to turn our dreams of a better future into a reality.

Consider a business leader whose behavior is inconsistent with the core values and corporate vision he claims to follow.  Consider the individual who constantly brings up his interest in health and wellness, yet makes unhealthy choices and rarely engages in physical activity.

EXERCISE:

Where in your life can you bring greater alignment between your words and your actions?
To whom, beside yourself, will you make the promises? What added support will be required to ensure this new level of personal responsibility?