“If you are going to doubt something, doubt your limits.”
—Don Ward, Late Canadian Hockey Player
There is no doubt that our lives have been limited in many ways these past few months. Our freedom to visit with friends, go out for a meal, and attend social gatherings has put the brakes on our lives.
With an unclear future and difficult current realities, our doubts about our capacities have thwarted our efforts, even when nothing but our own thinking is stopping us.
Over the year, I’ve recommended Rick Carson’s book, Taming Your Gremlin as a resource to take on the villainous bullies lurking in the shadows of our minds. His approach includes awareness, altering our behavior, creative visualization, and seeing ourselves as being “in progress.” These efforts can strengthen our capacity to doubt our doubts – to get out of our own way, and live a happier, more enjoyable life.
Pick up a copy of the book or check out THIS SHORT VIDEO check link to help tame your own pesky gremlins.
“If people are doubting how far you’ll go, go so far that you can’t hear them anymore.”
-Michele Ruiz, award-winning broadcast journalist
Image from Unsplash
Having supportive people in your life is a critical component to success.
It is bad enough when our own thinking fuels the seeds of doubt; we surely don’t need those around us sharing their limiting beliefs and negative views of our potential.
The coaching for today is to see these individuals as toxic, and to remove them completely from our worlds.
Who are the doubters and naysayers in your personal and professional worlds? In what ways can you get far away from them, to avoid their negative influence? How can and will you surround yourself with “true believers” to support your greatest personal and professional potential?
“It is wiser to find out than to suppose.”
-Samuel Clemens, writing as Mark Twain
Many years ago I read the book Fierce Conversations by Susan Scott. One of the most significant take-aways from her work was the idea that all conversations are first with ourselves, and sometimes they include others.
In fact, the prefix, “con” means “with” or “together,” and thus a conversation actually includes others. Susan Scott would suggest that what we often have are “versations” with ourselves, without ever reaching out to get the other person’s perspective. We simply suppose or “ass-u-me” we know what the other person is going to say or how they will likely respond. We all know about what assuming can cause.
How can you make a wiser choice by using a “when in doubt check it out” strategy in more of your interactions today?
“Inhale confidence, exhale doubt.”
The development of greater self-confidence is a high priority for many of the up-and-coming leaders I coach. These high potential individuals have already achieved a level of success, and yet, they are often challenged with a new assignment that requires skills and abilities they often feel they lack.
To inhale greater self-confidence and exhale doubt, consider some of the following strategies:
- Create a list of your current strengths and abilities.
- Listen, but be skeptical, when dealing with naysayers.
- Learn to accept compliments graciously.
- Exercise and become more physically fit.
- Read positive and self-affirming materials.
- Avoid associating with negative people.
- Notice your own inner voice, especially when it is self-critical, and release its negative impact.
- Always be learning and doing something each day to better yourself.
Feel free to reply to this post with your own confidence-building and doubt-reducing strategies.
“Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt.”
—William Shakespeare, playwright
image from www.huffingtonpost.ca
I had a hard time reading Shakespeare in high school – I just didn’t fully get it. Maybe it was my impatience or perhaps I can blame my English teacher!
For me, this quote is about how fear stops just about all of us in our tracks. Perhaps if we really, really focus on the good we wish to do, then we will find that secret life lever that will have us try, leap, and attempt, in spite of this fear.
Where is fear keeping you from the good you might do?
Where can you find the courage to overcome this fear and make the attempt?