“Eating an artichoke is like…”

Posted on February 12, 2015 by Barry

“Eating an artichoke is like getting to know someone really well.”

—Willi Hastings (attributed)

Photo from Flickr by sterotyp_0815

I have never prepared or eaten an entire artichoke, only the hearts from a can or those marinated in a jar.

Hasting’s statement peaked my curiosity and I wondered, “How difficult could this be?” If you are like me, you simply go to your favorite search engine and query the universe.

I learned that there is an eleven-step process to preparing and eating an artichoke. If the process is not followed closely, you could experience considerable digestive challenges, and problems with your garbage disposal as well.

How is eating an artichoke like getting to know someone really well? If you truly wish to get to the heart of another and develop a close, quality relationship, it takes time, patience, care, and attention to detail.

EXERCISE:

Examine the relationships you hope to make or take to a new level, professionally or personally. How would a patient and somewhat methodical approach yield the lasting, substantial relationships you desire?

“It’s not that I’m so smart; it’s just that… ”

Posted on February 11, 2015 by Barry

“It’s not that I’m so smart; it’s just that I stay with problems longer.”

-Albert Einstein

Illustration from Flickr by donkeyhotey

Albert Einstein has a fan club. He was launched into international super stardom when Arthur Eddington’s work confirmed his General Theory of Relativity, which eventually brought him the Nobel Prize in Physics.

Einstein’s name has become synonymous with genius, and in 1999 Time Magazine recognized him the “Person of the Century.”

Applications of his theories are seen in daily use in such devices as the television, remote control devices, automatic door openers, laser technology, and DVD players.

Einstein attributed much of his success to good old hard work and sticking with problems far longer than most people.

EXERCISE:

Where would sticking with a current problem or challenge longer than you normally would help you discover and realize your own genius?

“Teaching others scales right back to us.”

Posted on February 10, 2015 by Barry

“Teaching others scales right back to us.”

—Seth Godin, Author

Photo from Flickr by winnifredxoxo

I have always had a passion for learning. As a child, I remember vividly my mother coming upstairs to read after our evening meal and some family time. Although she had only a high school education, she had the most expansive vocabulary of anyone I knew.

My own family, and my wife’s, were educators, so it was not surprising that my first career was as a teacher. After a few years, I shifted to business and found myself in teaching roles within the company. For the past 22 years, I have continued to be both student and teacher as I pursue my professional efforts as a coach.

Over the years, I’ve learned by watching others, applying what I’ve learned, and learned the most by sharing what I learned with others. The lessons always scaled back to me with even deeper meaning and impact.

EXERCISE:

How can you learn what you most desire by watching people you admire, practice what you learn, and scale these lessons back to you even more by teaching others in your professional and personal life?

As Seth Godin said in his latest book, What to Do When It’s Your Turn, “Teaching rewards us all.”

“It’s time to make the donuts!”

Posted on February 9, 2015 by Barry

“It’s Time to Make the Donuts!”

—Dunkin Donuts

Photo from Flickr by Paehder

Readers of The Quotable Coach frequently ask me where I find the quotes. Beyond sites such as brainyquote.com, quotation apps, and the books I read, I often receive quotes, proverbs, and some just plain cool sayings from friends and colleagues.

Today, one of my friends from the health club notice that I was leaving about a half hour earlier than my usual time. He nonchalantly said, “It must be time to make the donuts!,” which is a branding phrase from Dunkin Donuts here in the United States.

The two take-aways for me in hearing this phrase were that I was up earlier than usual to get a start on my day, and that I had an important purpose to fulfill.

EXERCISE:

What important professional or personal project would have you wake up a bit earlier, get a jump on your day, and make some “delicious donuts” of your own?

“Most people do not listen with…”

Posted on February 6, 2015 by Barry

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”

—Stephen Covey, American educator, author, businessman, and keynote speaker

Photo from Flickr by Webbstjarnan.SE

Rate yourself on a scale from one to ten, with “one” being very poor and “ten” being outstanding, with regard to your mastery of Stephen Covey’s 5th Habit of Highly Effective People:

First Seek to Understand, then to be Understood

Consider reducing your score by one point if you:

Pretend to listen
Selectively hear only certain parts of the conversation
Miss the meaning of what the person is saying
Listen with the intent to reply
Filter what is being said through your own life experiences and frame of reference
Prematurely decide if what is being said has value, before the speaker has finished

The behaviors listed above are often called autobiographical listening.

EXERCISE:

To gain true and deep understanding of another required empathetic listening. Add points to your score if you:

Give the speaker your undivided attention
Are open-minded and nonjudgmental
Observe and sense the emotions behind the words being used
Are quiet and allow some time for the other person to fully express their view. Open-ended questions may be helpful here to make sure you gain the full depth of their viewpoint
Follow clarifying questions with attempts to restate what you believe they said

“If you want your children to…”

Posted on February 5, 2015 by Barry

“If you want your children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders.”

—Abigail van Buren, American “Dear Abby” advice columnist

Photo from Flickr by thetaxhaven

As one born in the middle of the Baby Boom, I find it very interesting to discuss with colleagues and friends the attitudes and general work ethics of the various generations currently in the workforce.

Although there are benefits to all points of view and perspectives, this quote from “Dear Abby” (whose real name was Pauline Esther Phillips) is a good piece of wisdom and coaching for parents, and for business professionals bringing in the next generation of workers.

EXERCISE:

Examine your own developmental journey, personally and professionally. When has assuming personal responsibility, or having it placed on you by a parent, mentor, or organizational leader helped you become a more grounded person?

“Man is a genius when he is dreaming.”

Posted on February 4, 2015 by Barry

“Man is a genius when he is dreaming.”

—Akira Kurosawa, 20th Century Japanese Filmmaker

Image from amazon.com

I am currently reading The Big Idea – How Breakthroughs of the Past Shape the Future , compiled by National Geographic. This visually stunning and well-organized manuscript explores some of the big ideas and big thinkers of the past and the present, who are shaping our present and future.

If you have an interest in health and medicine, transportation and space exploration, information and communication, biology and the environment, chemistry and material, physics, or the cosmos, this book is a gem!

EXERCISE:

What are your dreams for your professional or personal life, or for that matter, the world? How can you realize these dreams by tapping into the big ideas of others and capturing more of your inner genius?

“I’m no longer sure what the question is…”

Posted on February 3, 2015 by Barry

“I’m no longer sure what the question is, but I do know that that answer is ‘Yes.’”

—Leonard Bernstein, American composer, conductor, author, and pianist

Photo from Flickr by Valerie Everett

One of my favorite and longest standing clients – a man named Stephen – was recently on vacation. This may not ordinarily be remarkable except that he and his family were in Antarctica. On Facebook he posted the ultimate “Ice Bucket Challenge,” by jumping into the frigid waters of the Antarctic Ocean.

How many of us would have said “Yes” to such an experience?

Stephen and I have worked together for 19 years. I admire and respect his “Yes!” attitude and intention to be fully alive.

EXERCISE:

Examine the opportunities that lie in front of you today, professionally and personally. Where would saying “Yes” and leaping into your own life waters help you live an even more extraordinary life?

Consider picking up a copy of A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, to explore the writings of Donald Miller, another individual who chose to say “Yes.”

“Are you working to connect the dots or…”

Posted on February 2, 2015 by Barry

“Are you working to connect the dots or merely collecting more dots?”

—Seth Godin, Author

Photo from www.connectedaction.net

What is your favorite form of social media? If you go in order of popularity, the usage looks something like this:

Facebook has about 1.23 billion users
LinkedIn has about 332 million users
Twitter has about 284 million users

Please don’t respond saying my numbers are wrong, as they aren’t relevant to the point of this post.

Do you know how many friends, connections, or followers you have on each of your social sites?

Without question, the internet and social media have brought about amazing changes, making our world more connected and noisy to the point, for some, of addictive engagement.

Godin’s question asks if we are collecting friends or followers like dots, or are we truly looking to genuinely connect and contribute to other people’s lives.

EXERCISE:

Examine your skills, abilities, gifts, and talents that contribute to those on the other side of the monitor or mobile device. Consider that if you create something truly remarkable, you will likely have your very best friends and followers connecting the dots with you.

“Bad habits are like a comfortable bed, easy …”

Posted on January 30, 2015 by Barry

“Bad habits are like a comfortable bed, easy to get into, but hard to get out of.”

—Anonymous

Photo from Flickr by M01229

As I write this post, it is a brisk seven degrees here in Michigan, and yet I am still going to the gym to exercise.

My bed is comfortable, and far warmer than what awaits me outside. What gets me up and going when staying put would be far more pleasant?

Quite simply, I have made exercise a habit that takes far less discipline these days than it did in the past, before it became part of my daily routine.

The factors that lay beneath my exercise habit is the commitment I have made, and the value I attribute to being healthy.

EXERCISE:

What are the bad habits that no longer serve your professional or personal commitments? How will you embrace any discomfort you might experience by replacing one bad habit with one that will serve you better?