Tag Archives: Demp Coaching

Growth and comfort seldom ride the same horse

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“Growth and comfort seldom ride the same horse.”

—Author Unknown

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Image from Flickr by Montgomery County Planning Commission

When I was a small boy, I went to a carnival where I had the opportunity to ride a pony.  The initial aspect of walking in a circle at a slow pace was enjoyable – however, I found that my bottom got a bit of a jolt when we worked our way up to a trot!

At the start of a new year, very few of us wish to kick things off at a walking pace. Our goals are far more ambitious – and we must gallop forward to reach them with urgency.

Today’s quote suggests that we be prepared for a rough and sometimes bumpy ride to reach our destination before the setting sun.

Exercise:

Identify between two and three primary goals you have for 2014 where you are fully prepared for the possibility of a rough ride.

Share these goals with a coach, mentor, colleague or family member who will support your efforts to reach your destination.

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal

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“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else. You are the only one who gets burned.”

– Buddhaghosa, fifth century commentator on Buddha’s work

Image of hot coals

Image from Unsplash by Magnus S

No one in their right mind would ever pick up a hot coal to throw it at someone. In an instant, they would be raced off to the emergency room for treatment, and a very protracted recovery period. Most likely they would also bear considerable scars that would remain for years or perhaps for life.

Exercise:

Take note of the times when you observe the destructive force of anger today.

How can you minimize it, release it, or better yet, replace it with understanding, tolerance and forgiveness, to make for a more peaceful, accepting and loving world?

Life lived for tomorrow

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“Life lived for tomorrow will always be just a day away from being realized.”

– Leo Buscaglia, author and motivational speaker

Image from Unsplash by Ben White

Anticipation, expectation and the promise of a better tomorrow are powerful forces that can mobilize us to call forth our most committed efforts.

On the other hand, consider happiness, joy, fulfillment, and satisfaction. These emotions are primarily experienced in the moment and not in the future.

Far too many people lose sight of what is just in front of their noses because they are gazing off over the horizons of life.

Exercise:

Regardless of whether you are near-sighted, far-sighted or have perfect vision, how will you take the time to look all around today, to experience the fullest expression of each and every moment?

The greatest mistake you can make

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“The greatest mistake you can make in life is to continually be afraid you will make one.”

– Elbert Hubbard, writer, artist and philosopher

In the assessment process I undertake prior to each coaching agreement, I pay particular attention to the challenges and obstacles that may be limiting my client’s success.

We do identify many external factors that aren’t always in their control, yet it is surprising to discover the numerous internal barriers that limit their success and overall life satisfaction. Among these internal obstacles is the often crippling fear of making a mistake and failing, which often prevents them from even trying something new.

Exercise:

Where (specifically) are you stopped by the fear of making a mistake or failing? Find a coach, friend, family member, or mentor to help you summon the courage to work through these fears.

Sometimes, it is helpful to use the acronym “FEAR” which stands for “False Evidence Appearing Real.” Feel free to reply to me with your insights and the actions you plan to take.

in-focus picture in my head

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 “I never hit a shot – not even in practice – without having a very sharp, in-focus picture of it in my head.”

– Jack Nicklaus, American professional golfer

Jack NicklausImage from Flickr by hankinsphoto.com

Jack Nicklaus is considered by many the best golfer of all time. His accomplishments are far too many to describe here. Today’s quote is great coaching for all of us looking to achieve mastery and excellence in any area.

The power of a clear and compelling vision for some future event, even if it is a golf shot, is fundamental to mobilizing our thoughts and actions to make it so. Nicklaus and most people of great achievement seem to have a razor-sharp consistent and persistent ability to concentrate and focus on the prize.

Exercise:

Revisit the pivot point / self-coaching exercise first described here:

www.thequotablecoach.com/effort-2/it-is-common-sense-to-take-a-method-and-try-it-if-it-fails-admit-it-frankly-and-try-another-but-above-all-try-something

Use it to clearly determine your current reality, envision a sharp and focused future, and then, like Nicklaus, take the shot toward your goal.

Don’t be surprised if you hit your mark more often than ever before.

As your consciousness expands

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“As your consciousness expands, your level of expectation will grow. Keep asking yourself, am I selling myself short? Most of us are.”

—John R. Spannuth, President/CEO of the USA Water Fitness Association

Image from www.mattcromwell.com

The coaching process usually helps people delve into new areas of perception, reconsidering their views of reality and what is possible. This expanded consciousness can either increase our courage to pursue new possibilities or generate fear which can make us stop, or even run in the opposite direction.

Exercise:

In what areas of your life are you selling yourself short due to fear?

How can you summon the courage of your expanded consciousness to foster and realize new possibilities in your professional and personal life?

If you can’t explain it to a six year old, you don’t understand it yourself

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“If you can’t explain it to a six year old, you don’t understand it yourself.”

– Albert Einstein, theoretical physicist

image of Einstein with children

Image from Encyclopedia Britannica

In the world of physics, perhaps no-one is more famous than Albert Einstein. He is best known for the formula E = mc2 where E =energy, m stands for mass and c represents the speed of light.

There is genius in simplicity, in that it brings ideas and insight into our lives. Compare programming your first VCR with the simplicity of many of our plug-and-play devices today.

Exercise:

Look up the term “Occam’s Razor” and explore how making things in your life simpler is a road toward unleashing your own genius and creating a more user-friendly, workable world.

What we see when watching others

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“What we see when watching others depends on the clarity of the window through which we look.”

—Author Unknown

Woman looking through a Dirty Window

Image from Unsplash

Driving in Michigan, specifically in the Detroit metropolitan area, is challenging for numerous reasons. If we eliminate poor roads, construction and heavy traffic, we are left with what I call visibility challenges. Rain, fog, road salt, frost, snow, and splattered insects all have a way of reducing the clarity of our windshields.

I dislike not having clarity so much that I just had a special window treatment applied to our new SUV to better help us see where we are going.

Exercise:

What are some of your obstructing views, beliefs, and attitudes about others that are blocking your clear and objective view?

How can you apply your own perceptional “Windex” to help clarify what you see in others and in yourself?

one corner of the universe

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“There’s only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that’s your own self.”

– Aldous Huxley, author

Photo by John Sting on Unsplash

Those of you who have been reading The Quotable Coach for some time may know that in my first career 30 years ago I was a science teacher. Two subjects I found most fascinating were astronomy and physics.

Entropy (“the degree of disorder and randomness of a system”) is constantly at work expanding the universe and bringing disorder to our world. Fortunately, as Huxley suggests, we can use our own energies to counter this disorder and design the world as we desire.

Exercise:

How will you use your energy today to improve your corner of the universe?

How can you combine your energies with others to make even larger improvements in your world?

“Don’t compromise yourself. You’re all you’ve got.”

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“Don’t compromise yourself. You’re all you’ve got.”

– Janis Joplin, singer-songwriter

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Earlier this month, my family celebrated the wedding of my daughter Rachel in Sanibel Island, Florida. It was simply the best event I’ve ever attended. The venue was a secluded beach, complete with close family and friends. We also got the bonus of a beautiful rainbow, an inspiring sunset, and even some dolphins swimming by.

Videographers, photographers, great food, a beautiful venue and dancing till midnight were just some of the things that made it special.

The credit for these memories goes to many people, especially my extraordinary wife Wendy and my beautiful daughter for never compromising their vision of a fairy-tale wedding come true.

Exercise:

What could you achieve by not compromising? How can you take a step closer to your highest vision today?