Tag Archives: Demp Coaching

“We are always the same age inside.”

Posted on by

“We are always the same age inside.”

– Gertrude Stein, American writer

Image of mother and daughter jumping

Image from Flickr by mikebaird

As I write this, I’m  in Florida with my dad and wife. I can’t believe how much self-reflection I’m doing as I observe everyone going about life as seniors and in many cases super-seniors.

Social clubs and activities abound, and I feel as if I’m in what my wife Wendy refers to as “winter camp”! Of particular note is the level of youthful spirit I see in those around me as I go to the gym, play golf, go out for meals with friends, attend shows and even go out for frozen yogurt at my normal bedtime back home!

These people are still very much the same age inside – and though time has provided a number of bumps that may slow them down a bit, their youthful zest for life keeps them looking forward to each new day.

Exercise:

Examine how your own external image of yourself reflects of your internal age. What thoughts do you have daily that reflect a significantly younger you?

Consider taking the Real Age test to compare your chronological age to what they describe as your “real age.”

“When furious, get curious.”

Posted on by

“When furious, get curious.”

– Author Unknown

480

Image from Flickr by isforinsects

It seems like there is a lot of anger in the world these days. Consider what you observe each day in such areas as our roadways, parking lots, social media, television – especially news programming – politics, the workplace, and even in our own homes.

How often are you the direct recipient of this anger? How often might you be a contributor to it?

Anger can be seen as the outcome of some triggered portion of our comfort zones, based on past experiences or events. The quote above is suggesting that instead of allowing the trigger to automatically generate an anger response, we enter a state of inquiring and curiosity to see what is behind this response – thus resulting in a more workable and peaceful solution.

Exercise:

Pay particular attention today when you observe yourself (and others) getting angry. Ask yourself one or more of the following questions to engage your inquiring mind and observe what happens:

  • What emotions and feelings am I experiencing right now?
  • What is occurring that is triggering these emotions?
  • When else has that occurred in the past, and what was the end result of my response?
  • What alternative responses are possible that will result in a more satisfactory outcome?

Consider picking up a copy of Susan Scott’s book Fierce Conversations to explore additional techniques that can assist you in similar situations.

Take Another Step

Posted on by

“If you take another step, and another, you will be surprised to know how far you can go from the point you thought was the end.”

– Marc and Angel, personal development writers

477

Image from Flickr by Bods

Whether it’s taking one more step or going the extra mile, the power of persistence is without question a key to success. Being persistent helps build self-confidence. Once you know you can make it through one struggle, you’re more likely to take that next step in other areas of your life.

A good friend once told me that what stops most people is … stopping. What if we simply didn’t buy in to a life of ease and convenience, and tapped into our own personal grit and character to keep going, stay the course, and finish strong on those things that matter most?

Exercise:

What issues, challenges or struggles are you currently facing that would most benefit from taking the next step and then another until you arrive victorious?

Hope is a good breakfast

Posted on by

“Hope is a good breakfast but it is a bad supper.”

– Francis Bacon, English philosopher

Image of coffee and pastry breakfast

Image from Flickr by Kathryn Yengel

Starting each day with a hopeful mindset is very important – just as many nutritionists indicate that breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

If hope, however, is all we have to keep us going, we’ll feel that grumbling sound in our stomachs at supper time.

Exercise:

What other factors constitute the meals and fuel that keep you going throughout your day, to move you from hopeful intentions in the morning toward goal realization by bedtime?

Wait for the answer

Posted on by

“Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer.”

– William S. Burroughs, American writer

468Image from Flickr by anieto2k.

One of my favorite phrases about coaching is “coaches let their questions do the heavy lifting.” If this is true – and I assert that it is – then we can all coach others, be coached by others, and even coach ourselves. We need only ask the right questions, then relax as our answers reveal themselves.

It is through this personal inquiry that our question-answering muscles do the work and allow us to grow and evolve.

Exercise:

What one or two important questions do you need to ask and answer for yourself today?

clocks stop

Posted on by

“There are people whose clocks stop at a certain point in their lives.”

– Charles Augustin Sainte-Beuve, French literary critic

463Image from Flickr by oatsy40.

As I sit in my favorite chair writing this, it’s Sunday February 2nd. That’s right, it’s Groundhog Day.

But I’m not referring to that little furry creature, Punxsutawney Phil, or whether he saw his shadow. Instead, I want to describe the movie Groundhog Day, starring Bill Murray, which is a bit of a guilty pleasure for me.

If you’ve not seen the (ahem) “masterpiece,” the moral of the story is that until Phil Connors (Bill Murray) changes his ways, he will be destined to live a life that is making him a bit insane by being the same person he’s always been before – i.e. his clock has stopped.

Exercise:

How can you put a fresh battery in your life clock to make the very most of the time remaining to live life to its fullest?

“With brains, heart and courage, you can achieve anything you desire.”

Posted on by

“With brains, heart and courage, you can achieve anything you desire.”

—Inspired by the Wizard of Oz

461

Image from Flickr by twm1340

When I was a young boy, my family loved The Wizard of Oz. This movie, with its black and white to vivid color transition, amazed all of us with both the images and the compelling story.

If it’s one of your favorites too, you will recall Dorothy’s journey along with the Scarecrow, Tin Man and Cowardly Lion to reach the great and powerful Wizard of Oz.

Of course the story line also involves the Scarecrow discovering his brain, the Tin Man finding his heart, and the Lion embracing his courage.

Exercise:

What habits and practices can you develop and undertake in order to fully use your brain, heart and courage to fully achieve your greatest desires?

“Your greatness is measured by your horizons.”

Posted on by

“Your greatness is measured by your horizons.”

– Michelangelo, Renaissance sculptor and painter

456

Image from Flickr by The Nick Page.

When was the last time you watched the weather report on the evening news? In addition to temperature, humidity, and chance of precipitation, they sometimes include “visibility,” which is the distance one can see clearly toward the horizon.

Consider not only how far you can see into the distance but also what you can see. The inspirational and vivid goals within your horizons, as Michelangelo suggests, can be the fuel of greatness.

Exercise:

Imagine you have the capacity to expand your vision’s clarity and distance, viewing your personal horizons through a telescope or binoculars.

What horizons do you see that will be the measure of your greatness in the days and weeks ahead?

“The greatest story you will ever tell is your own.”

Posted on by

“The greatest story you will ever tell is your own.”

– Charlie Rose, American broadcast journalist443Image from Flickr by visual.dichotomy

A few years ago, my family started a new tradition of taking one day over the holidays as a “movie marathon day” where we all see the top movies back-to-back from early morning until midnight.

This year it was five in a row, but in previous years some of the gang saw as many as six or seven. We all love to be carried away by the drama, romance and humor of these wonderful stories.

Exercise:

During January, please take about 15- 30 minutes to do a “year in review” to identify the signature stories that would make up your highlight reel of 2013.

Take another 15 – 30 minutes to script out your coming attractions for the year ahead, doing your best to make sure it would be nominated for your best year ever.

Teaching is instinctual art

Posted on by

“Teaching is an instinctual art, mindful of potential, craving of realization, a pausing, seamless process.”

A. Bartlett Giamatti, former president of Yale University

441

We have all heard the quote “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.”Think for a moment about the times when this quote has been most apparent in your own life. How often were you the student? How often were you the teacher?

Exercise:

Consider how we are always experiencing being both the student and the teacher in a seamless tapestry of continuous learning.

In the year ahead, how will you be the student and the teacher in your life and in the lives of others, to fully pursue the boundless possibilities and potential in yourself and in those around you?