Tag Archives: Demp Coaching

Don’t be satisfied with stories

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“Don’t be satisfied with stories, how things have gone with others. Unfold your own myth.”

—Rumi, 13th-century Persian Sunni Muslim poet

Image of a woman watching TV and eating popcorn

Image from Unsplash by Jeshoots.com

One of my daily rituals is to read the Word of the Day provided by Merriam-Webster. You can subscribe by email at Merriam-Webster.com.

The word of the day on which I wrote this post was vicarious. It pertains to today’s quote in that we gain a particular experience in our imagination through the feeling and actions of another person.

Consider all the secondhand and surrogate experiences we take in through television, movies, sporting events, social media, and of course, good old gossip.

How does ingesting vicarious stories and experiences truly contribute positively to your world, beyond the distracting, entertainment value?

EXERCISE:

How and in what ways can and will you live, moving forward, to become far more of the main character of your own life story?

Even though the future seems far away it is actually beginning right now

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“Even though the future seems far away, it is actually beginning right now.”

—Mattie J.T. Stepanek, late American child poet & agent of peace

image of Mattie Stepanek with Oprah Winfrey

Image of Mattie Stepanek from oprah.com

What is the best time to plant a tree? If you’ve heard this question before, you know the answer is something on the order of, “25 years ago.”

The typical follow-up question to this riddle is, “What is the next best time to plant a tree?” The answer is, of course, “Today!”

Those of us who desire a more fruitful future continually look for and take the next step that will begin or continue the journey. In this way, we can realize the future that may initially seem far away.

EXERCISE:

What specific seeds will you plant within your community efforts today? Better yet, what will you do right now to make this possible future a reality?

Friday Review of Posts on Challenges

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Friday Review: Challenges

How do you perceive and react to challenges in your life? Here are a few challenge-related posts you may have missed. Click the links to read the messages.

 

“Kites rise highest against the wind, not with it.”

 

 

 

 

“The tests of life are not meant to break you, but to make you.”

 

 

 

 

“It isn’t the mountains ahead to climb that wear you out. It’s the pebble in your shoe.”

 

 

 

Never mistake a clear view for a short distance

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“Never mistake a clear view for a short distance.”

—Mark Spain, top Real Estate Broker

illustration of the distance between earth and Mars

Image from SpaceNews

Have you ever looked up at the night sky and seen Mars without a telescope?

If you have, you were viewing the red planet – which won’t appear red – at a distance of about 34 million miles, when at its closest to Earth.

Although the math is complicated, and there is no way to travel to Mars in a straight line – which, if you could, would take 39 days – here is a list of a few missions and the time it took for the journey:

  • Mariner 9, the first spacecraft to orbit Mars (1971): 168 days
  • Viking 1, the first U.S. craft to land on Mars (1995): 304 days
  • Mars Science Laboratory (2011): 254 days

EXERCISE:

To what degree are you fully prepared to go the distance on one or more personal or professional goals, that you can clearly see ahead?

An object in possession seldom retains

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“An object in possession seldom retains the same charm that it had in pursuit.”

—Pliny the Younger, lawyer, author, and magistrate of Ancient Rome

image of a hand placing a piece in a jigsaw puzzle

Image from Unspash by Ryoji Iwata

I recently saw the film Puzzle, in which Kelly Macdonald plays a woman living a dull and predictable life. One boring day, she finds a puzzle on the shelf and decides to give it a go, only to discover a wondrous joy in putting it together with great speed and mastery.

Consider life as a puzzle we piece together over time, sorting the variety of colors, straight edges, and of course, those all-important corners, to frame our picture of an extraordinary life.

For some reason, there seems to be far more interest and attraction to fitting in the new pieces that come our way, and a bit of taking for granted what we have already accomplished and put into place.

EXERCISE:

How would a greater appreciation for who you are and what you have provide more satisfaction as you purposefully pursue the pieces needed to complete your picture of a wonderful life?

A simple Hello could lead to a million things

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“A simple ‘Hello’ could lead to a million things.”

—Author Unknown

Image of hands holding up pink balloons spelling "hello"

Image from Unsplash by RawPixel

I see a very kind woman most mornings at my health club. Her name is Pat, and her primary job is to swipe each person’s membership card as they enter the facility.

I know her husband’s name is John, and that she, like me, has a passion for books and reading. Perhaps what is most notable is that she welcomes each person with an authentic ‘Hello!” and a pleasant glance, which in turn generates a reciprocal greeting and kind words from almost everyone.

On days Pat is not at the front desk, the greeting ritual is far less likely, with the front desk person and most of the patrons going through an almost robotic entrance.

EXERCISE:

Where could a few more Hellos, Good Mornings, Pleases, and genuine Thank You’s lead to millions of wonderful things to brighten the day? How can you be more like Pat in your personal and professional communities?

Are you doing what matters

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“Are you doing what matters, or just reacting to the noise?”

—Brendon Burchard, American motivational author

Image of a man holding his ears to block out noise

Image from Unsplash by chairulfajar

It is a rainy Sunday as I write this. I am at home in my designated writing and reading chair, where I am rarely interrupted. Reading and writing are two activities that matter a lot in my life, so I proactively carve out time – especially on weekends – for both.

Rest, recharging, and renewal efforts on these days have also had me limit my cell phone use, primarily to family and friends. I’ve also cut back on virtually all forms of noisy media, to about 20% of what it was a year ago.

EXERCISE:

Consider taking five or ten minutes to create two lists. Label the first “What Matters Most in My Life?” and the second “What Represents the Noise in My Life?”

Once you have a solid list for each category, please apply the More/Less, Start/Stop Strategy to enhance your happiness and life satisfaction.

Friday Review of Posts On Virtue

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Friday Review: Virtue

Who are the virtuous people in your life? Here are a few virtue-related posts you may have missed. Click the link to read the full message.

 

“Men’s evil manners live in brass; their virtues we write in water.”

 

 

 

 

“Virtue is not left to stand alone. He who practice it will have neighbors.”

 

 

 

“You can preach a better sermon with your life than with your lips.”

 

 

 

 

It is greed to do all the talking

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“It is greed to do all the talking but not to want to listen at all.”

—Democritus of Abdera, Ancient Greek pre-Socratic philosopher

Cartoon of a Vampire

Image from Canva

Vampires really do exist.

Consider the individuals in your life who talk incessantly and rarely take a breath to allow others to express themselves.

In such situations, many people experience a draining feeling as if much of their energy was stolen.

Who are some of the greedy energy vampires in your world? Who among your family, friends, and colleagues, might place you on their list?

EXERCISE:

Where would far more generous listening and far less greedy talking make the biggest difference in your world? What action can and will you take today to make this possibility a reality?

Before You Speak

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“Before you speak, ask if what you’re about to say is kind, necessary, true, and better than silence.”

—Barbara Ann Kipfer, Author of Self Meditation

Image of a smiley face zippered

Image from DLKT Kids

Filters can be very helpful things.

Consider water filters over the centuries. They have improved the sanitation of our towns and cities. They have helped us all live longer, healthier lives by removing all types of bacteria and other substances.

These days, our airways are filled with toxins through various forms of communications and include our daily conversations. It’s actually a form of communication pollution, which can also make us sick.

EXERCISE:

What would be the benefit in your personal or professional worlds if, beyond silence, we all filtered out all the unkind and unnecessary statements before they left our lips?

What would be possible if all people took this coaching?