What I Might Be

“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”

—Lao Tzu, Chinese philosopher

Image from beyouonlybetter.com

Image from beyouonlybetter.com

We all want to be ‘right’ – to have the correct answer, to know the truth. We think that will bring us clarity, stability, and peace of mind.

But what if being ‘right’ only serves to put us in a safe and limiting box?

When we define something, we limit it. Perhaps we could instead distinguish ourselves by being open to the possibility of who we could be rather than placing limits on who we are.

EXERCISE:

How and in what ways can you disengage from self-limiting beliefs?

If you find this difficult, ask a family member or close friend for their perspective.

Nothing Ventured

“Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained.”

—Geoffrey Chaucer, 15th Century English Poet

image from urbana.ie

image from urbana.ie

Take a moment today to look back over your life at some of your most memorable and significant accomplishments. Pay particular attention to the level of effort and engagement it took for you to realize these noteworthy achievements.

How much did you venture to realize these gains? We can’t relive or change the past, but the future is literally a blank canvas on which we can venture forward to realize gains of remarkable scale and scope.

EXERCISE:

What would be possible if you took a “many things ventured, many things gained” perspective today and in the days ahead? What will be the first action you plan to take to make the years ahead even more remarkable and rewarding?

Is the Glass Half Empty

“People who wonder whether the glass is half empty or half full miss the point. The glass is refillable.”

—simon sinek, speaker and author

 

Image from breacan.org.au

Image from breacan.org.au

Imagine you have an entire month to take the road trip of your life, anywhere you wish. You have just won the use of a large luxury mobile home or recreational vehicle. The only limitation is that you were only given half a tank of fuel.

Of course, we can look on the bright side of things to estimate how far we could go, or we can be upset given the limited range available for this adventure. This view of things seems silly knowing that we always have the ability to top off the tank anytime we wish.

EXERCISE:

Where in either your professional or personal worlds are you operating with the half full or half empty perspective?  What would be possible if you assumed an attitude of overflowing abundance instead?

“A bad attitude is like…”

“A bad attitude is like a flat tire. You can’t go anywhere until you change it.”

-Author Unknown

Photo from Flickr by Paul Chenoweth

Photo from Flickr by Paul Chenoweth

Take a minute to list the people in your personal and professional worlds that have a bad attitude. If you need a bit of help, consider their level of negativity, pessimism, sarcasm, skepticism, and general resignation.

Have you captured your list of half-empty, no possibility, “what’s the use” folks? Now see how much you enjoy their company, or working with them. Where, if possible, have you already headed for the hills or done what you can to avoid these people?

What are the chances selected individuals in your world might be placing you on their list?

EXERCISE:

Although changing other people’s flat tires is tremendously difficult, you do have a far better fighting chance of changing your own. Consider the resources at www.lifehack.org to take a few simple steps to begin.

A bonus is that your own efforts will tend to inflate other people’s tires in the process!

“The Things You Say About Others…”

“The things you say about others, also say a lot about you.”

—Mark Amend, American Poet

Image from 8tracks.com

Image from 8tracks.com

We have all heard the phrase “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”

As you observe your own behavior and that of others, how well do you think we are living by these words? What is your opinion of others who always seem to be putting others down, or sharing a critical, negative perspective, whether asked or not?

EXERCISE:

Examine the things you say about others, or better yet, ask others to share their objective observation about your behavior in this area. What does this say about you, and what modifications are needed to receive a far better appraisal?

“I wonder how many people…”

“I wonder how many people I’ve looked at all my life and never seen.”

-John Steinbeck, American Author

Image from differencebetween.info

Image from differencebetween.info

 

What is the difference between looking at something, and truly seeing it?

Whether it’s a painting or a person, my sense is that the differences can be great or small, considering the circumstance.

Great art, and in the case of today’s quote, the art of relationship creation and sustainability, requires a level of mastery seldom available to the paint-by-number novice.

EXERCISE:

Where can you place the time and effort to gain the depth of connection, cooperation, and collaboration you desire in your professional and personal lives, through more seeing and less looking?

“Traveling: it leaves you speechless, then…”

“Traveling: it leaves you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller.”

—Ibn Battuta, 14th century Moroccan explorer

photo from goodreads.com

photo from goodreads.com

One of my favorite books by Dr Seuss is Oh The Places You’ll Go, often given as a gift to high school or college graduates as they step into their life journey.

For many of us, this sense of adventure and excitement wanes as we settle into our day-to-day lives, work, and other more routine responsibilities.

Perhaps this is why most of my coaching clients have travel, adventure, and fun as things they want more of as they move forward. We simply want more WOW moments that leave us speechless. When we tell these “wow” stories, they often ignite the flame in others, causing them to more fully experience life, too.

EXERCISE:

Where have you longed to travel? Find someone who has actually been there – or perhaps a few people – and let their stories ignite a spark in you. When you make your plans and go yourself, consider what stories you will share that would benefit others.

“I am definitely going to take a course…”

“I am definitely going to take a course on time management, just as soon as I can work it into my schedule.”

—Louis E. Boone, U.S. academic author

Photo from Flickr by Jeremy Osterhouse

Photo from Flickr by Jeremy Osterhouse

If you are like most people, time management is an area that could use a bit of improvement. Who doesn’t want to accomplish more in less time? Who wouldn’t want to have more time to enjoy the pleasures of life?

The paradox is that you must invest more time to gain greater mastery in your management of this elusive commodity. Just like investing money usually creates greater wealth, investing time in mastering its allocation and use can pay huge dividends.

EXERCISE:

Please consider the following three resources:

  1. If you only have 15-20 minutes, feel free to download my free workbook on Time Management Strategies and Tactics, or simply reply to this post and I will send it to you.
  2. Pick up and study a copy of Getting Things Done by David Allen
  3. Consider reading The Power of Full Engagement by Jim Loehr and Tony Schwartz

“Travel and change of place…”

“Travel and change of place impart new vigor to the mind.”

-Seneca, Roman statesman & tutor to Nero

Photo from Flickr by Eelke de Blouw

Photo from Flickr by Eelke de Blouw

Traveling in Europe was a learning smorgasbord. I did all I could to taste the variety and abundance of its offerings, including:

The variety of languages multiple currencies
Jaw-dropping architecture Local customs & traditions
Music & art Great food and drink
Business & commerce Politics & religion
The natural beauty & history of the region

As an American, I was shocked at how my mental models and perceptions of the world have limited me and kept my world reasonably small. As a business and personal coach, I plan to take the blinder off, in particular with my coaching colleagues who live beyond my doorstep.

EXERCISE:
How can you more fully benefit from your own travels and change of place to experience greater vigor in your journey of the mind?

“I would like to travel..”

“I would like to travel the world with you twice. Once, to see the world. Twice, to see the way you see the world.”

—Author Unknown

Photo from Flickr by Nilanjan Sasmal

Photo from Flickr by Nilanjan Sasmal

The majority of my coaching clients would include travel as one of their core values. They want to see and experience more of the world with the precious time they have left. To some extent, they have a bit of regret that they haven’t made a bigger dent in their bucket lists.

Have you ever noticed how much joy and excitement is experienced when a baby is born?  Perhaps it is because this new life allows all of us—especially the new parents and grandparents—to start a new life “adventure” with a child who is seeing the world for the first time.

EXERCISE:

How can you be far more intentional in your efforts to see and experience the world, and at the same time, double your pleasure by looking through the eyes of those who share the adventure?