“The Things You Say About Others…”

Posted on September 15, 2015 by Barry

“The things you say about others, also say a lot about you.”

—Mark Amend, American Poet

Image from 8tracks.com

We have all heard the phrase “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”

As you observe your own behavior and that of others, how well do you think we are living by these words? What is your opinion of others who always seem to be putting others down, or sharing a critical, negative perspective, whether asked or not?

EXERCISE:

Examine the things you say about others, or better yet, ask others to share their objective observation about your behavior in this area. What does this say about you, and what modifications are needed to receive a far better appraisal?

“I wonder how many people…”

Posted on June 18, 2015 by Barry

“I wonder how many people I’ve looked at all my life and never seen.”

-John Steinbeck, American Author

Image from differencebetween.info

What is the difference between looking at something, and truly seeing it?

Whether it’s a painting or a person, my sense is that the differences can be great or small, considering the circumstance.

Great art, and in the case of today’s quote, the art of relationship creation and sustainability, requires a level of mastery seldom available to the paint-by-number novice.

EXERCISE:

Where can you place the time and effort to gain the depth of connection, cooperation, and collaboration you desire in your professional and personal lives, through more seeing and less looking?

“Traveling: it leaves you speechless, then…”

Posted on June 10, 2015 by Barry

“Traveling: it leaves you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller.”

—Ibn Battuta, 14th century Moroccan explorer

photo from goodreads.com

One of my favorite books by Dr Seuss is Oh The Places You’ll Go, often given as a gift to high school or college graduates as they step into their life journey.

For many of us, this sense of adventure and excitement wanes as we settle into our day-to-day lives, work, and other more routine responsibilities.

Perhaps this is why most of my coaching clients have travel, adventure, and fun as things they want more of as they move forward. We simply want more WOW moments that leave us speechless. When we tell these “wow” stories, they often ignite the flame in others, causing them to more fully experience life, too.

EXERCISE:

Where have you longed to travel? Find someone who has actually been there – or perhaps a few people – and let their stories ignite a spark in you. When you make your plans and go yourself, consider what stories you will share that would benefit others.

“I am definitely going to take a course…”

Posted on June 9, 2015 by Barry

“I am definitely going to take a course on time management, just as soon as I can work it into my schedule.”

—Louis E. Boone, U.S. academic author

Photo from Flickr by Jeremy Osterhouse

If you are like most people, time management is an area that could use a bit of improvement. Who doesn’t want to accomplish more in less time? Who wouldn’t want to have more time to enjoy the pleasures of life?

The paradox is that you must invest more time to gain greater mastery in your management of this elusive commodity. Just like investing money usually creates greater wealth, investing time in mastering its allocation and use can pay huge dividends.

EXERCISE:

Please consider the following three resources:

If you only have 15-20 minutes, feel free to download my free workbook on Time Management Strategies and Tactics, or simply reply to this post and I will send it to you.
Pick up and study a copy of Getting Things Done by David Allen
Consider reading The Power of Full Engagement by Jim Loehr and Tony Schwartz

“Travel and change of place…”

Posted on June 8, 2015 by Barry

“Travel and change of place impart new vigor to the mind.”

-Seneca, Roman statesman & tutor to Nero

Photo from Flickr by Eelke de Blouw

Traveling in Europe was a learning smorgasbord. I did all I could to taste the variety and abundance of its offerings, including:

The variety of languages	multiple currencies
Jaw-dropping architecture	Local customs & traditions
Music & art	Great food and drink
Business & commerce	Politics & religion
The natural beauty & history of the region

As an American, I was shocked at how my mental models and perceptions of the world have limited me and kept my world reasonably small. As a business and personal coach, I plan to take the blinder off, in particular with my coaching colleagues who live beyond my doorstep.

EXERCISE:
How can you more fully benefit from your own travels and change of place to experience greater vigor in your journey of the mind?

“I would like to travel..”

Posted on May 8, 2015 by Barry

“I would like to travel the world with you twice. Once, to see the world. Twice, to see the way you see the world.”

—Author Unknown

Photo from Flickr by Nilanjan Sasmal

The majority of my coaching clients would include travel as one of their core values. They want to see and experience more of the world with the precious time they have left. To some extent, they have a bit of regret that they haven’t made a bigger dent in their bucket lists.

Have you ever noticed how much joy and excitement is experienced when a baby is born? Perhaps it is because this new life allows all of us—especially the new parents and grandparents—to start a new life “adventure” with a child who is seeing the world for the first time.

EXERCISE:

How can you be far more intentional in your efforts to see and experience the world, and at the same time, double your pleasure by looking through the eyes of those who share the adventure?

“All things come to pass.”

Posted on May 5, 2015 by Barry

“All things come to pass.”

—Heraclitus, pre-Socratic Greek Philosopher

Photo from Flickr by Kpcmobile

We’ve all heard the phrase “Nothing Lasts Forever.” This, of course, includes the good things as well as the bad. After each great storm the sun shines again, and then the clouds and storms return.

Given these facts, how might we gain power from Heraclitus’ words of wisdom? Perhaps we can choose an optimistic frame of reference to both maximize and celebrate the good in life, and also minimize the times when life brings us down.

EXERCISE:

How can you accentuate the positive and eliminate or at least minimize the negative, which will come to pass throughout your day?

Consider making the exercise above a daily practice to support you in living an even more extraordinary life.

“If time were to take on…”

Posted on April 20, 2015 by Barry

“If time were to take on human form, would she be your task master or freedom fighter?”

—Richie Norton, author, entrepreneur, strategic advisor

Photo from Flickr by Gioia De Antoniis

Each of has the same 24-hours in our day. Some view this “life capital” from a constraining, scarcity perspective, thinking there is never enough. This often reflects on their attitudes and their level of fulfillment and engagement.

Others view time with an attitude of abundance. They champion and make the most of every moment, fully embracing the gifts each day can bring.

EXERCISE:

What adjustments can you make to your views about time to become more of a “freedom fighter” and less of the “taskmaster”?

“There are people who would love to have your bad days.”

Posted on March 25, 2015 by Barry

“There are people who would love to have your bad days.”

—Author Unknown

Photo from Flickr by Tristan Bowersox

A few weeks ago I visited my family physician. I was having a difficult time with a challenging bug affecting a lot of people.

My symptoms included sneezing, sinus congestion, a headache, a scratchy throat, and every coach’s occupational nightmare – laryngitis. My voice vacillated between bullfrog and complete silence.

My appointment time was 3:00 p.m.; I was still in the waiting room at 3:50. The only distraction was the video wall, showing the four seasons at a number of beautiful locations, and other images in the natural world.

Perhaps the most revealing way in which I passed the time was in observing other patients and their significant health challenges. It caused me to shift my perspective of my own “monumental” situation.

EXERCISE:

Notice how often you make mountains out of molehills, or major in the minors of life. Realize all the goodness and reasons for gratitude that surround you. How many people do you see in the course of your days that would prefer to have your life, even when you are having a bad day?

“To be interested in the changing seasons is a happier state of mind than to be hopelessly in love with spring.”

Posted on August 21, 2014 by Barry

“To be interested in the changing seasons is a happier state of mind than to be hopelessly in love with spring.”

– George Santayana, philosopher and writer

Image from Flickr by thekeithhall.

Consider the following phrases:

Thank God it’s Friday.
I can’t wait until I retire.
I’m dreading going back to work.
I’ll be happier when…
I hate the cold and snowy winters.
The summer is too hot and sticky.

Rarely are people completely happy with their current situation. If they are, it is often episodic and temporary, due to the fact that things are always changing.

The people who seem to be the happiest make the most of every situation they encounter. These people usually bring along a positive attitude and a sunny disposition.

Exercise:

How can you accept and make the most of every situation today, to bring a little more springtime wherever you go and whatever you do?