“Don’t fight forces: use them.”

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 “Don’t fight forces: use them.”

– R. Buckminster Fuller, architect and inventor

As a former science teacher, I have always been interested in the forces of nature. Consider wind energy and wave energy, two forces of nature we often face in our outdoor activities.

If you happen to play golf, you know what it is like to drive a ball into 20 mile per hour headwind versus having the same breeze at your back.

In terms of water energy, have you ever tried to swim or boat against the current or through an oncoming wave?

Exercise:

Explore the personal, professional, social and cultural forces around you to see how you might use these energies versus fight against them to move forward in your life.

“Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment.”

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“Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment.”

– Jim Rohn, entrepreneur, author, and motivational speaker

As many of the readers of The Quotable Coach series know, one of my core values is health, and one of my habits is daily exercise.

The other day, I watched a special 3-month-long boot-camp session at my club and saw how the trainer and the participants created a rigorously, supportive and highly-disciplined environment to bridge the gap between each participant’s goal and the accomplishment of real objective results.

Exercise:

What areas of your professional or personal life are lacking the discipline needed to reach your goals?

Hire a coach (or drill sergeant) to support your efforts with a customized “boot-camp” to grow and strengthen your discipline muscle.

An alternative is to find a personal or professional partner and provide support for each other.

Choose yourself

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“Choose yourself.”

– Seth Godin, author and entrepreneur

In recent months, I have met with numerous executives to explore next steps regarding their career advancement. Two of the most common options include advancement within their existing organization or creating an exit strategy to pursue greener pastures with another company.

Unfortunately in some cases, the entryway into the C-suite may be blocked, or the phone simply doesn’t ring with those plum assignments. In some cases, even after considerable networking and outreach efforts, they have yet to be picked for the team.

Exercise:

Take out one of your business cards and turn it over to the blank side. Write your name then the title “President” or a title of your choosing just under it.

By choosing yourself, you virtually eliminate all the current internal barriers that may be stopping you. Now all you need to do is overcome the external constraints to play your own game and make your ideal career a reality.

“The journey of a thousand miles begins and ends with one step.”

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 “The journey of a thousand miles begins and ends with one step.”

– Lao Tzu, founder of Taoism

We have all heard this famous quote a thousand times.  What about all those steps in between?

Of course we would all acknowledge the important of taking the initiative with the first step toward our goals. Once we have done so, we are at a new beginning point, ready to take the next first step.

In the beginning, it may be difficult to move toward our goals – however, with persistence and the development of this habit to act, we will be much more likely to find ourselves taking that last step to reach our desired destinations.

Exercise:

Identify at least one professional or personal goal that you deeply desire, where you find yourself procrastinating or simply stopped in your tracks.

Brainstorm alone or with others the first, second, etc. steps toward its achievement.

Before you know it, you will have arrived.

Please reply to this message and let me know the goals you choose to pursue – and what happens.

“Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any [other] one thing.”

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“Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any [other] one thing.”

– Abraham Lincoln, 16th President of the United States

One of the questions I ask all of my coaching clients is, “What makes someone an excellent coach?”

People often include such attributes as:

  • Superior listening skills
  • Genuine caring
  • Diversity of expertise and experience
  • Optimism
  • Integrity
  • Commitment

Although all great qualities, this question – which happens to be a trick – has very little to do with the coach. The critical factor is you or in this case, the person being coached.

As Lincoln points out, your resolution to succeed and willingness to do the work is paramount to achieving your goals.

Exercise:

Assess how strong your resolution is to pursue and achieve greater results in your personal and professional life. What added support do you require from within and from those around you to ensure your success?

the highest advantage

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“You can rest assured that if you devote your time and attention to the highest advantage of others, the universe will support you.”

– R. Buckminster Fuller, architect and inventor

About a year ago, I picked up a copy of Dan Sullivan’s book The Laws of Lifetime Growth. Law #3 states that we should always make our contribution bigger than our reward.

Both Fuller and Sullivan suggest that a focus on creating new kinds of value for others expands our relationship with the outside world and somehow magically attracts new rewards and opportunities to us in return.

Exercise:

Imagine that giving to others and supporting their highest advantage is like making consistent daily bank deposits, and that these investments always have a high rate of return through the magic of compound interest.

“Imagination is a quality given to man to compensate him for what he is not and a sense of humor was provided to console him for what he is.”

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“Imagination is a quality given to man to compensate him for what he is not and a sense of humor was provided to console him for what he is.”

– Oscar Wilde, writer and poet

The development of self-awareness and the ability to adapt to life’s circumstances are critical skills developed and enhanced during a coaching relationship.

Quite often, I discover many people I work with have strong “inner critics” and tend to emphasize their own perceived shortcomings. At the same time, many of these same individuals take themselves and life far too seriously, which often diminishes their pleasure and enjoyment of life.

Exercise:

Try on “Wilde coaching” by exercising both your imagination and sense of humor to bring greater fulfillment and satisfaction to your days.

Let your friends, mentors and coaches in your life know that you intend to make these efforts so that they can help you improve your likelihood of success.

“We know more than we know we know.”

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“We know more than we know we know.”

– Unknown

One of the coach’s most powerful tools is the open-ended question: you know, those questions that can’t be answered with a simple “yes” or “no”.

Who could have imagined that the six simple trigger words of who, what, when, where, why, and how could bring forth a level of knowledge and wisdom in others far deeper than we see on the surface?

Exercise:

Imagine yourself and others as an iceberg where what we know we know is only the observable part above the surface. (With icebergs, this is typically only one-eighth of the whole.)

Practice asking yourself and those around you more open-ended questions to discover how much more we actually know that lies below the surface.

“We are betrayed by what is false within.”

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“We are betrayed by what is false within.”

– George Meredith, Victorian poet and novelist

Imagine for a moment that your life has a soundtrack – an internal playlist that informs you about every aspect of your personal and professional life. What if, however, there was a poltergeist or some other form of gremlin that installed some of your playlist without your knowledge?

If this happens to be the case, you may find yourself dancing to or even singing a tune that could betray you.

Exercise:

Like trying on a piece of clothing when shopping, pay particular attention today and throughout this week to the ideas you express and the thoughts suggested by others, to see if they support or betray your very best self and true nature.

“An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind.”

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“An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind.”

– Mahatma Gandhi, pacifist leader of Indian independence movement

I’m not a big fan of gossip, negativity and conflict. For me, revenge is never sweet – and the idea of war is inconsistent with everything I hold dear.

When you look into the animal kingdom, you only see examples of killing as a means of eating and survival. Humans seems to have an appetite for conflict over the millenniums and today all you need to do is watch TV for the latest news report, sporting event, or reality TV show to see this.

Exercise:

How can you channel your inner Gandhi to make your own life, communities, and world more peaceful places?