Friday Review: Expectations
What expectations do you carry for yourself? How do you react to the expectations others hold for you? Here are a few related posts you may have missed.
Stillness is what aims the archer’s arrow
“Stillness is what aims the archer’s arrow, it inspires new ideas, it sharpens perspective and illuminates connections.”
—Ryan Holiday, American author, and host of the podcast The Daily Stoic
Image from Unsplash by Mario Doberman
Being still seems like such a passive thing to do. How could the lack of movement get us where we want to go and accomplish the things we desire?
Without a careful aim we certainly miss our targets.
Without new ideas we are destined to keep circling back to the ones whose time has passed.
Without greater perspective we are unlikely to pursue paths meant for today and our future.
Without our connections and communities, we are left as lone rangers, isolated and alone.
EXERCISE:
How could you squeeze greater benefits out of stillness in your life?
Where can it act as a quiet place to reflect and improve your world in so many ways?
Be careful not to let the noise in your mind overpower the whispers of your heart
“Be careful not to let the noise in your mind overpower the whispers of your heart.”
—Cory Muscara, international speaker and teacher on mindfulness and positive psychology
Image from Unsplash by Nick Fewings
As a child I was fearful of going to the doctor. The unfamiliar surroundings, the strange smells, and the anticipation of getting a shot from the scary nurse was something to dread.
Doctor Wiederman was always kind and gentle, with a reassuring voice. On one visit, he let me use his stethoscope to listen to my heartbeat. This pulsing sound seemed to let me know that everything was OK and that he and his staff were only there to keep me healthy.
As I’ve gotten older, my perspective on my heart has expanded from a blood pumping organ to the source of my soul. Taking the time to be quiet and listening to its messages is something we can all practice daily.
EXERCISE:
Where and when do you take the time to listen to the whispers of your heart?
How can you quiet the noisy voices of your mind to embrace this inner wisdom?
As we grow older, real beauty travels from the face to the heart,
“As we grow older, real beauty travels from the face to the heart, appeal turns to charm, hurt to wisdom, and great moments to shared memories. The true beauty of life is not how happy you are now, but how happy others are because of you.”
—Author Unknown
Image from Unsplash by Logan Weaver
How old are you?
When was the last time you took a good look in the mirror?
How does your self-appraisal compare when you view yourself from the inside versus the outside?
Without question, entropy is having its way with all of us and many of us are grasping desperately for our younger days.
Today’s quote can be a wonderful way to re-frame our perspective on the aging process.
It helps us see what we’ve been given and gained with all the days gone by.
EXERCISE:
How can you more fully embrace the process of aging and look to the happiness you have fostered in the lives of others along the way?
Sometimes just stopping makes space for something new to show up
Sometimes just stopping makes space for something new to show up.
—Calm App Reflection
Image from Unsplash by Joshua Hoehne
One thing that stood out on our recent return from Florida was the reckless drivers we saw everywhere. Among their most notable traits was how rarely these motorists ever came to a full stop at stop signs on side streets.
Perhaps they saw the red hexagons as mere suggestions, and rolled right through.
Stopping completely has considerable value in both driving and in life. It gives us time to not only look both ways but to also look within.
Assessing our realities, clarifying our intended destinations, and then proceeding with care seems like a wise way to go.
EXERCISE:
Where in your life and world do you roll through the stop signs?
How would applying the brakes more often — and more fully — create a space for something new to show up?
Friday Review: Vision
Friday Review: Vision
How clear is your vision for yourself and your future? Here are a few elated posts you may have missed.
“Approach every task as though it were the moment that will define you.”
“The best way to ride a horse is in the direction in which it is going.”
“It’s amazing how a little tomorrow can make up for a whole lot of yesterday.”
“When you feel the swell of life around you, simply drift…..”
“When you feel the swell of life around you, simply drift…”
—Mark Nepo, Author of The Book of Awakening
Image from Unsplash by Osman Rana
How often do you feel the tender and inspiring aspect of life around you?
Who are the people, where are the places, and what are the things that lift you up and carry you through your days?
Where do you experience a strong sense of resonance and belonging that touches your heart and soul?
How long do you linger in these moments?
Explore this list to see if any of these events strike a chord:
- The embrace of a loved one
- Observing acts of kindness or generosity
- Children playing
- The many beautiful aspects of nature
- Examples of personal excellence and mastery
- Music
- Art
EXERCISE:
Create a list of 5-10 moments in which you feel the swell of life. How can you linger and drift with these feelings more fully and more often?
“It takes some know how to know how to say no.”
“It takes some know how to know how to say no.”
—Author Unknown
Image from Amazon
Yesterday’s post was about reaching the point of diminishing returns and the heavy costs we often pay.
Perhaps the most often used strategy to lighten our loads is to just say NO. How often have you given this approach a go, and how did things work out?
One primary reason saying NO is so difficult is that we don’t wish to damage the relationship. When we don’t create boundaries and say NO, we often hurt ourselves and feel considerable resentment.
EXERCISE:
Here are some useful books you may explore to help you learn to say NO:
The Power of a Positive No by William Ury
The Power of No by James Altucher and Claudia Azula Altucher
The Book of No by Susan Neuman
Boundaries by Henry Cloud and John Townsend
The Art of Saying No by Damon Zahariades
At what point in your efforts do you experience the point of diminishing returns
“At what point in your efforts do you experience the point of diminishing returns? When is enough enough?”
—Author Unknown
Image from Unsplash by Suzi Kim
What is your profession? How many hours do you typically work each week?
Consider the career of an accountant: seven days and over 80 hours a week is often the norm for many of these folks this time of year.
What about other professions such as those in the medical field during Covid and significant staff shortages?
Maybe you are a homemaker or caregiver with young children or aging parents who also needs to be a breadwinner. If any of these situations sounds familiar, you have likely reached and exceeded the point of diminishing returns.
EXERCISE:
What are the costs to you and others when you consistently go beyond your limits?
What new or different strategies can you employ when enough is more than enough?
How do you prepare your mind and body for the task at hand
How do you prepare your mind and body for the task at hand? Establishing simple repeatable rituals can help.
—Calm App Reflection
Image from Unsplash by TJ Dragotta
Are you a basketball fan? Did you watch any or all of the madness in March? If so, you are probably familiar with some of the pre-shot routines players use before each free throw. Close your eyes and picture the number of ball bounces, deep breaths, and other gestures of your favorite players.
EXERCISE:
Where in your world do you engage in simple repeatable rituals to help you remain calm, centered, and focused on the task at hand?
Consider looking at the example of others who perform at the highest levels and see what they do to be their best.