Tag Archives: influence

“Power is influence over external events. Peace is influence over internal events.”

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“Power is influence over external events. Peace is influence over internal events.”

—James Clear, Author of Atomic Habits

Image from Unsplash by Belinda Fewings

When was the last time you felt powerless?

Take a close look at times in your personal and professional worlds when your progress was stalled or stopped. Examine both big and small situations to see how you responded.

When external events don’t go your way it’s often helpful to go within to grant yourself a sense of peace.

Your inner world can provide smoother sailing and open roads even when obstacles block your external paths.

EXERCISE:

Mindfully explore your ability to experience peace and power. When you find the external doors of life closed, notice how your inner world can help you find more peaceful paths forward.

I am a citizen of the world

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“I am a citizen of the world.”

—Diogenes, Ancient Greek Philosopher

Image from Unsplash by NASA

When was the last time you voted?

During these opportunities to select our preferred candidates, there are often chances to weigh in on proposals that affect our communities. These decision points give us a chance to influence our world, based on what we value and prioritize.

What would it be like to have a global election in which various proposals to better planet earth were on the ballot?

How might we all exercise our vote to take on and tackle the critical issues that affect all of us as global citizens?

EXERCISE:

What top priority proposals would you expect to find on a global ballot?

How can and do you exercise your vote with your daily efforts to improve things for yourself and your neighbors around the world?

Be a model instead of a mouthpiece. The best coaching is a good example

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Be a model instead of a mouthpiece. The best coaching is a good example.

—Calm App Reflection

Image from Unsplash by krakenimages

Who do you want to lead and influence in your life? Perhaps there are co-workers and professional colleagues, or some family members you hope to inspire in a particular direction.

Where would you like them to go and what would you like them to do?

When you speak with them, what types of reactions and responses do you usually get?

How engaged and enrolled do they seem when your actions don’t always line up with your words?

EXERCISE:

Where and how do you model the behaviors you wish others to take in your various communities?

How can you adjust your coach approach to make an even bigger impact on those you wish to influence?

There is greatness in doing something you hate for the sake of someone you love

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“There is greatness in doing something you hate for the sake of someone you love.”

—Shmuley Boteach, American Orthodox Jewish rabbi, author, and television host

Image from Unsplash by Bethany Beck

In my mind, there is perhaps no greater love than that of a parent for their children.

Consider everything a mom goes through including birth, sleepless nights, countless diaper changes, runny noses, potty training…. You get the idea.

Of course, fathers do their part, but moms are clearly the unsung heroes of the world.

Their influence in good times—and especially bad—have given all of us the enduring support to be who we are today.

EXERCISE:

In what ways can you and do you acknowledge the greatness of the moms of the world?

How can you also acknowledge others in your life who do things they hate because of their deep love for you and others?

Nothing taught by force stays in the soul

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“Nothing taught by force stays in the soul.”

—Plato, ancient Greek philosopher

Image from Unsplash by Christopher Ryan

Who were the teachers, mentors, coaches, and family members who had the most positive influence on you while growing up?

How did their lessons and good examples open up your soul to their wisdom, to become an integral part of your personality and character?

How did their kindness and care for your best interest help you remain an open book to guide your current pursuits and project?

EXERCISE:

How often do an open mind and open heart accompany each other?

Where and how can this idea open the souls and minds of others you intend to support and serve?

“Distractions! Let them come. Let them be. Let them go.”

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“Distractions! Let them come. Let them be. Let them go.”

—Culadasa, former director of the Dharma Treasure Buddhist Sangha

Image from Unsplash by Nubelson Fernandes

How many people and things are competing for your attention each day?

How many are welcome, and how many divert you from your desired paths?

Where and how do you have control — or at least significant influence — on what enters your direct and peripheral attention?

Imagine you were a healthcare professional in an emergency department, caring for people who showed up at the door. How would you triage individuals with critical needs versus those with only minor difficulties?

In each case, determining who gets immediate care and admitted to the hospital and who gets sent home is what’s important.

EXERCISE:

How do you triage the distractions that enter your world?

How would your own mental and physical health benefit from a more clearly defined method to do this?

Although the best coaching may be offered by good examples

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Although the best coaching may be offered by good examples the next best may be found in bad examples. It is up to each of us to discover the lessons in both.

—Calm App Reflection

Who are the people in your life that set a wonderful example of living a rich and meaningful life?

How would you describe their character and best qualities?

How has their example impacted and influenced your personal and professional efforts?

Where in your world do you see terrible examples of how to live?

Where do you see people acting in ways that are contrary to what you value and believe?

How have their bad examples taught you valuable lessons that led you on a far better path?

EXERCISE:

Take an extra close look at the good and bad examples exemplified by people in your various communities.

What new or different choices and actions will you make and take from these observations?

Don’t ever work for someone you don’t want to become

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“Don’t ever work for someone you don’t want to become.”

Kevin Kelly, Founding Executive Editor of Wired Magazine

Image from Unsplash by Christina Victoria Craft

How have you been influenced by the great resignation? What is it that makes large numbers of people leave their jobs to pursue other ventures, given the need many of us have for safety and security?

More and more people these days are insisting on thriving, not just surviving. Life is short and we only have one. Experiencing current regrets and projecting them into the future is not acceptable. Observing those around us in distress — and perhaps feeling our own — has many people throw more caution to the wind to chart a new and better course.

EXERCISE:

How good a fit is your current job? To what degree do you admire and respect the leadership within your organization? How proud would you be to see yourself in their shoes down the road? If the shoe doesn’t fit, what then?

Shape behaviors instead of shaming them

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“Shape behaviors instead of shaming them.”

—Sam Horn, CEO of The Intrigue Agency

Image from Unsplash by Lea L

How do you go about getting the things you want? How do you influence and persuade the people in your life to act in ways that you desire?

What are your current strategies and approaches with family members, neighbors, and your professional colleagues? As parents, grandparents, and other influencers of young impressionable minds, today’s quote is particularly relevant.

I recently attended an engaging webinar on Ethical Persuasion by Sam Horn, in which she introduced many practical and creative ways to gain attention and buy in to our ideas and intentions.

She shared what she called “words to lose” and “words to use” when we want to transform resistance into rapport. Here are just a few of her suggestions:

Words to Lose: but —should — you’ll have to
Words to Use: and — next time — If you would please

EXERCISE:

What are some of the words you use that are shaping or shaming the people in your life?

“Broad ideas influence more people. Specific ideas influence people more.”

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“Broad ideas influence more people. Specific ideas influence people more.”

—James Clear, author, entrepreneur, and photographer

Image from Unsplash by Mark Fletcher-Brown

On any give weekday it is possible for thousands of people to be influenced by this blog via email, LinkedIn, Facebook, and Twitter.

For the past ten years I have attempted to share daily nuggets of wisdom to influence many people with thought-provoking and/or motivational quotes, a coaching commentary, and an exercise to dig deeper and apply these ideas.

With many of us overwhelmed by far too much information from far too many sources, my efforts to have people invest five to ten minutes per week are not always successful.

During the same five days, four to six individuals invest an hour to engage me in a variety of specific ideas and approaches through one-on-one coaching, to impact and enhance aspects of their personal or professional lives.

EXERCISE:

What impact are you attempting to have with people in your various communities?

Where are specific — rather than broad — ideas the way to go to have the level of influence you intend?