“Who can you give the credit to, before you take some for yourself?”
—Michael Bungay Stainer, Founder of Box of Crayons
Harry S. Truman once said, “You can accomplish anything in life, provided that you do not mind who gets the credit.”
The classic book, Good to Great by Jim Collins supports this idea as a critical characteristic of what he calls Level 5 Leadership. Collins found, through extensive research, that the focus on the success of others rather than on one’s own contributions and accomplishments were key attributes for those who achieved breakthrough results.
Who in your professional or personal communities has earned and deserves far more credit than they are currently given? When will you recognize and reward their significant contribution – today, and on an ongoing basis?
“He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away.”
—Raymond Hull, Canadian Playwright and Lecturer
Image from Unsplash by Nathan Lemon
In the best selling book, Give and Take by University of Pennsylvania professor, Adam Grant, we learn the pros and cons of being a “giver.”
Grant divides givers into two groups:
The first group have high other-interest and low self-interest. This can work against their giving nature; they burn out, or as put in today’s quote, whittle themselves away.
Conversely, the group Grant calls “other-ish,” maintain high self-interest along with high other-interest. This keeps them on an even keel and provides optimal results for themselves and others.
How can you more fully maintain your own self-interest and well-being while generously contributing to others in your professional and personal worlds?
“Her soul was too deep to explore by those who always swam in the shallow end.”
Image from ripplecentral.com
Most of us are familiar with the stories of prospectors digging for gold or other precious gems, and know that these valuable resources are rarely found at the surface. We must dig deep into the earth to claim them.
The same is true if we wish to reap the rich rewards of deep and meaningful relationships with friends, family, and colleagues. Scratching the surface with limited attention virtually never creates the respectful, trusting, and soulfully satisfying relationships we all desire.
Where and with whom can you explore and pursue a deeper, more meaningful relationship in either your personal or professional life?
“Love the giver more than the gift.”
-Brigham Young, founder of the Latter Day Saints
Years ago, I read The Five Love Languages to enhance my relationship with my wife Wendy. I still recommend this book to coaching clients who wish a better understanding of their partners. The gist is that there are different ways to show love. We almost always choose to show love in the way we like to receive it.
By tuning into the offerings of others, we can embrace their gifts in the way they are intended, instead of missing the message because we are not speaking the same love language.
How could you fully love the givers in your life by embracing every gift they have to offer, in the love language that fits them?
“A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.”
– Arnold H. Glasow, author
Image from blog.bcwinstitute.org
Do you know who your true friends are? Today’s quote presents a bit of a test to help you identify the good ones. These are the people who support us in living our best lives and stand for us being all we can be.
At the same time, they are also the people who are there during life’s challenging and difficult times to lend us a shoulder to lean on – or carry us completely when things are at their darkest.
Thank the friends around you for being there in both good and difficult times, and while doing so, look within yourself to see how you stack up as a friend to others.
“A friend is a loved one who awakens your life in order to free the wild possibilities within you.”
– John O’Donohue, poet, philosopher and Catholic priest
Someone once told me that friends are the family we choose for ourselves. That puts friendships in a very special category of relationships.
One of the key attributes of our friends is that they are tuned into our personal life frequencies. We are far better together than apart.
What are two to three areas of your life that need to be awakened? What would you consider to be a wild possibility in these areas?
Who are the friends that bring this special spark to your life, and how can you be this kind of friend for others?