“Happiness is the harvest of a quiet eye.”

“Happiness is the harvest of a quiet eye.”

—Austin O’Malley, 20th Century ophthalmologist and professor

image from Unsplash by Paz Arando

Who are the people in your personal and professional communities who experience the most Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)?

And those who seem to be always gazing over their neighbor’s fence to view what appears to be a greener, better manicured lawn?

To what degree do their comparisons and potential envy sap their happiness and satisfaction with life?

How do these questions apply to you?

EXERCISE:

Where would the quiet eye of looking more fully at the richness of your world help you harvest greater happiness?

“What is the cost of getting it wrong? What are the payoffs of getting it right?”

“What is the cost of getting it wrong? What are the payoffs of getting it right?”

—Author Unknown

Image from commons.wikimedia.org

Are you a fan of Bill Gates? If you are—and even if you aren’t—please consider watching the new Netflix docu-series Inside Bill’s Brain. Among the many twists and turns in his personal and professional life is a unifying fact. Bill is a highly intelligent, life-long learner who wants to continue to make a positive difference with his life and the foundation he runs with his wife Melinda.

Highlighted in this series are his initiatives to eradicate polio, improve sewage conditions in developing countries, and the development of a cleaner, safer form of nuclear power.

Despite many challenges and setbacks faced on such monumental projects, he is clearly focused on the global payoffs of getting it right.

EXERCISE:

What is one significant project you have yet to start due to the fear of getting it wrong? What would be the payoff of getting it right?

Obstacles in your path

“There are plenty of obstacles in your path. Don’t allow yourself to become one of them.”

—Author Unknown

Image of a locked fence

Image from Unsplash by Jason Blackeye

The TV show, Running Wild with Bear Grylls, comes to mind when I think about today’s quote.

In this show, famed adventurist and survivalist Bear Grylls takes top stars from the entertainment and sports worlds into the most remote and pristine locations in the world for a 48-hour journey of a lifetime.

Cast members face their deepest fears and tackle everything from wild animals to rock rappelling through some of the world’s most unforgiving wilderness.

We all face a wide variety of daily external obstacles that fall short of these life-threatening challenges. We also create many internal challenges that stop us in our tracks, as abruptly as if our lives were on the line.

EXERCISE:

Where are you currently your own worst enemy, or putting up your own internal barriers? What one courageous action can you take today to create a breakthrough in this area?

Make visible what without you might never have been seen

“Make visible what, without you, might never have been seen.”

—Robert Bresson, 20th Century French Film Director

Today’s quote reminds me of “Our Deepest Fear” by Marianne Williamson in her work A Return to Love. It is often incorrectly attributed to Nelson Mandela.

I thought sharing these words in their entirety might stir something in you, even if you are familiar with this wisdom.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

EXERCISE:

Where and how will you generously, courageously, and visibly contribute your unique and special qualities and talents to the world?

Everyone is a moon

“Everyone is a moon and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.”

—Mark Twain, in Following the Equator

Image of a full moon in a volatile sky

Image from Unsplash by Brooke Lark

Did you know that when you look up at the night sky and view a full moon you are seeing exactly what every other human – and for that matter, every other creature on Earth – has viewed for millennium?

Based on the rotational speed of the moon and the position of the Earth and Sun, we only get to see one-half of the moon’s surface.

People are like the moon, in that they often only present the sunny side of themselves. We sometimes tend to keep our dark side – including our weaknesses, fears, and perceived imperfections – hidden from view.

EXERCISE:

How might an exploration of your dark side, and perhaps revealing it to those you trust, create new opportunities and possibilities for you over (at least) the next lunar cycle?

Friday Review: FEAR

FRIDAY REVIEW: FEAR

How often do you let fear stop you from achieving your goal? Here are a few fear-related posts you may have missed. Click the links to read the full message.

 

“Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt.”

 

 

 

“Become so wrapped up in something that you forget to be afraid.”

 

 

 

 

“Do one thing each day that scares you.”

 

 

 

 

The Scariest Moment

“The scariest moment is always just before you start.”

-Stephen King, American Contemporary Horror Author

Image from themostimportantnews.com

Image from themostimportantnews.com

Take a minute to consider the scariest moments in your life. Things that might come to mind are:

  • Public Speaking
  • A really fast roller coaster ride
  • Skydiving
  • Getting a new job that requires skills you do not have
  • Writing your first book or starting your first business
  • Resigning from a stable job to transition into a new career

Experience all the sensations we associate with fear: cold sweats, shakes, rubbery legs, and your heart pounding in your chest.  How often do you stop and retreat? How often do find the courage to move forward?

EXERCISE:

I’d like you to try being courageous for just 20 seconds when you experience scary moments. When you feel fear welling up, tell yourself “I can be brave for 20 seconds,” or “I can handle that for 20 seconds.”  Before long, you will discover the exhilaration and excitement of getting past the barrier of fear we all experience.

Start today, and commit to developing a 20-second courage habit every day this week, and beyond.

“If it scares you, it may be…”

“If it scares you, it may be a good thing to try.”

-Seth Godin, American Author

QC #803

As I examine my own life and identify its highlights, I realize that many of them involved overcoming a fear in order to achieve some form of breakthrough. Among them are:

  • Starting my first business at age eleven!
  • Risking rejecting in applying to a highly competitive high school.
  • The “What Ifs” of resigning from a secure yet unsatisfying Fortune 500 career to enter the coaching profession when it was in its infancy.
  • The fear of judgement as I began speaking to increasingly large groups of people.
  • Risking potential criticism and judgement in writing and publishing my own blog and book.

EXERCISE:

Examine the things that have scared you over the years, and look at what scares you today. Where would giving some of these things a try help you overcome the fears and bring you even greater rewards and life satisfaction?

“Fear doesn’t prevent death…”

“Fear doesn’t prevent death, but it certainly prevents life.”

—Darren Hardy, Publisher of Success Magazine

Photo from Flickr by Juan Pablo Gonzalez

Photo from Flickr by Juan Pablo Gonzalez

Many years ago, I attended a personal development seminar with about 150 people where the presenter asked the participants why most people get up in the morning. Following a variety of expected responses such as “to go to work and make a living,” he gave his own answer.

He said that most people get up in the morning because they did not die in their sleep.

The entire audience was shocked.

His perspective was that a majority of people navigate through their days a bit robotically without any level of excitement, vitality, or enthusiasm.

Fear, he suggested, was a primary reason many of us lower our sights and play it safe. Rather than not being dead, he asked us to look at the question: What does it mean to be fully alive?

EXERCISE:

In what way will you overcome a fear you may have by summoning the courage to be fully alive today?

“Do one thing each day that scares you.”

“Do one thing each day that scares you.”

—Eleanor Roosevelt, longest-serving First Lady of the United States

Photo from Flickr by Nikki Collett

Photo from Flickr by Nikki Collett

I’m not a big fan of being scared. I don’t care for heights, roller coasters are not on my list of fun activities, and I’m unlikely to go to scary movies. Why are such activities so popular with many people?

Facing my fears gives me a booster shot of “Aliveness.”  When I examine the fears I held as I entered and pursued my career in coaching, these things happened:

  • I resigned from the stability of a Fortune 500 Company, without a salary to support myself, my wife, and my two young children.
  • I spent three months networking and reaching out to people I did not know, with no tangible results.
  • I gave many talks and speeches (public speaking is one of most people’s fears) to numerous groups to create awareness of my services.
  • I tapped into savings to secure an office instead of working from home to save money.

EXERCISE:

What one thing will you do today that scares you and will help you achieve an authentic goal and fulfill more of your highest potential?