Friday Review Character


How would people describe your character?  Here are a few character-related posts you may have missed. Click on the links to read the full message.

“Character is like a tree and reputation like its shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing.”




“There’s plenty of room at the top, but there’s no room to sit down.”





“Your smile is your logo. Your personality is your business card. How you leave others feeling after having an experience with you becomes your trademark.”






say something nice

“Gossip is the Devil’s Radio.”

-George Harrison, member of The Beatles

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I clearly recall my parents emphasizing the adage, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” Unfortunately, this altruistic idea is difficult when we desire to belong and fit in with our various communities.

Using the radio metaphor, where do you stand in your willingness to receive destructive transmissions? When do you initiate them? Given our hyper-connected social media world, these messages can spread like wildfire.


What if you choose to be an angel – rather than a devil- by sharing only positive, affirming messages today? What would be possible if we all engaged in this approach?

The Best Preparation for Tomorrow

“The best preparation for tomorrow is doing your best today.”

—H. Jackson Brown, Jr. author of Life’s Little Instruction Book

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Virtually everyone entering into a coaching relationship desires a better future. They want to go beyond ordinary, to achieve EXTRA-ordinary results and relationships in all aspects of their lives.

Doing your best and going the extra mile today is one sure bet that you will be further down the road when you take your first steps tomorrow morning.


Examine the following areas of your life to decide what extra attention and effort you will take to  support your better tomorrow:

Health Relationships Community
Learning/Skill Development Family Balance
Work Spiritual Growth Hobbies/avocations

Make the commitment: reply to this post to let me know what actions you plan to take.

Small Minds

“Don’t let small minds convince you that your dreams are too big.”

-Zig Ziglar, late American author and motivational speaker

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Who are some of the small-minded people in your personal or professional worlds? What qualities or characteristics have you assigned to them? See how many of the following qualities describe those who appear to have diminishing or completely crushing the dreams of others as their purpose:

Antagonistic Righteous Fear-Based
Condescending Oppositional Aloof
Perfectionism Judgmental Overly Aggressive
Controlling Critical Unethical
Combative Wishy-Washy Disrespectful
Temperamental Pessimistic Arrogant
Volatile Uncooperative Dishonest


How can you reduce or eliminate the small-minded people in your world, and replace them or attract more big-minded people to support your biggest personal and professional dreams?

Consider making a list of the big-minded qualities and characteristics to help you recognize these folks when you meet or see them.

Won’t Change You

“If it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you.”

—Fred Devito, American Yoga Instructor

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What areas of your personal or professional life would you most like to change for the better? How long have you wanted these changes in your life? If your answer is “far longer than I care to admit,” a new approach will be required.

The New Year is just around the corner and a high percentage of people will be looking to resolve or achieve far more this time around.

One key to this success is to choose only a small number of challenging objectives that will cause you to stretch and grow, and to garner many more social and structural sources of support to virtually guarantee your success.


List one or two challenging goals for the New Year. Display them in multiple places in your personal and professional worlds. Solicit the rigorous support of a coach, mentor, family member, or friend, who will not give up on you to assure the lasting changes and results you desire.

Once this has occurred, select another priority goal and repeat the process, to have your best year yet!

What You Want Most

“Don’t give up what you want the most for what you want right now.”

-attributed to Peter Rossomando, Head Football Coach at CCSU

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A characteristic shared by many of the most successful people is their ability to delay gratification in order to achieve their most highly desired objectives.

In the late 60s/early 70s Stanford University psychologist Walter Mischel did a study in which children ages four to six were given the choice between one marshmallow provided immediately, or two marshmallows if they waited for 15 minutes. In follow-up studies, the researchers found that those who were able to wait longer for the preferred rewards tended to have better life outcomes.


What disciplined actions, behaviors, and habits must you develop in order to resist short-term wants so that you can realize your most cherished and valued priorities?


“Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after the other.”

—Walter Elliot, 19th Century Scottish Politician

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My daughter Rachel is one of the hardest working, most persevering people I know.

Over a six-year period during college and a few years beyond, she was involved in a 12-week summer sales program in which she worked over 80 hours each week.

Despite many challenges including bad weather, barking dogs, and of course, tons of rejection, she was committed to selling high-quality educational products. She broke her day into two-hour manageable blocks of time, which helped her manage her efforts in small short races, instead of being overwhelmed by the long road ahead.


How can you use Rachel’s strategy – running many short races one after the other – to demonstrate the perseverance you need to win your most important personal and professional races?

“Live in such a way…”

“Live in such a way that if someone spoke badly of you, no one would believe it.”

-Author Unknown

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During the very early stages of a new coaching relationship, I often give my clients the assignment to describe their best future self. This exercise forces each individual to look deeply at the qualities and characteristics they wish to develop and expand upon during the course of our relationship and beyond.

We employ a strategy in which they examine past and current role models they admire and respect, knowing that if others could act and achieve such remarkable things, it is possible for them as well.


Upon your passing, what would you like others in your personal and professional worlds to say about you?

What adjustment will you make in the way you live today to guarantee this as your legacy?

“The book that will most change…”

“The book that will most change your life is the book you write.”

—Seth Godin, American author and entrepreneur

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It has been just over a year since I published The Quotable Coach – Daily Nuggets of Practical Wisdom. The process, from my first blog post to published book, took over two-and-a-half years.

I have always loved quotes. I enjoy the inner journey as I look at my own life. The 30 months of developing the book were far different in that I found myself digging deeper, and wrestling more fully than ever before. It was, without question, the extra efforts that resulted in the most profound gains I’ve experienced, professionally and personally.


If you were to write a book that would result in substantial growth, what would be the topic? How can you begin this process today? Possible first steps could be a journal entry, a blog post, or a short story.