Tag Archives: wisdom

Whether to say it

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“A smart person knows what to say. A wise person knows whether or not to say it.”

—Author Unknown

When can less be more? How often do you find yourself giving others advice or sharing your wealth of knowledge and experience, only to find that it is unwanted?

Were you ever that kid in school who raised their hand saying “call on me!” so you could share the right answer and show how smart you were? If so, what reaction did you receive from the other students? If not, how did you feel about your classmates who did?

I have found it very useful, in recent years, to restrain my exuberance to share what I know in order to more fully allow others to share and contribute their thoughts and ideas. Not surprisingly, I learn far more when my mouth is shut and my ears are open!

EXERCISE:

Where can less from you and more from others be a wiser recipe for your future success?

drowning in information

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“We are drowning in information and starving for knowledge.”

—Rutherford D. Rogers, Deputy Librarian of Congress

Image of keyboard, hands, coffee, and watch

Image from Unsplash by Catheryn Lavery

Did you know that the average person has five social media accounts, and spends one hour and forty minutes browsing their networks each day?

The average adult also spends more than twenty hours online, and watches over thirty hours of television per week.

How does your usage compare to these statistics? To what degree are you drowning in information?

Unfortunately, many of us simply assume that is “the way things are,” and that we simply need to keep up with the pace of life and swim for our lives.

EXERCISE:

Estimate what percent of the information you take in through social media and other sources is truly valuable and worth knowing.

Begin today, through a more discerning perspective, to remove or eliminate at least one such source until your head is fully above water.

To Profit from Good Advice

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“To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it.”

—John Churton Collins, Literary Critic

Image from tanveernasser.com

Image from tanveernasser.com

I put significant focus on an individual’s self-awareness when I begin a new coaching engagement. To do this, I introduce an “inner voice” exercise, in which the person pays close attention to:

  • What their inner voice is saying,
  • Determining if this voice is supportive or critical,
  • Determining how open and receptive they are to the thoughts of others.

Most people discover that when they look for the value and contribution in what others say, they reap greater rewards and boost their relationships.

EXERCISE:

How and in what ways can you shift your own “inner voice” to receive more good advice and wisdom from others?

Wiser To Find Out

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“It is wiser to find out than to suppose.”

-Samuel Clemens, writing as Mark Twain

When in doubt

Many years ago I read the book Fierce Conversations by Susan Scott. One of the most significant take-aways from her work was the idea that all conversations are first with ourselves, and sometimes they include others.

In fact, the prefix, “con” means “with” or “together,” and thus a conversation actually includes others. Susan Scott would suggest that what we often have are “versations” with ourselves, without ever reaching out to get the other person’s perspective. We simply suppose or “ass-u-me” we know what the other person is going to say or how they will likely respond. We all know about what assuming can cause.

EXERCISE:

How can you make a wiser choice by using a “when in doubt check it out” strategy in more of your interactions today?

Build a Bridge

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“Cry a river, build a bridge, get over it.”

—Author Unknown

Image from landscapesofunderstanding.com

Image from landscapesofunderstanding.com

For most people I work with as a coach, life is difficult, challenging, and often upsetting from time to time. Some are so stuck or stopped that they can hardly see any path forward.

During these times, feelings run high and the “emotional tension” they experience as part of their current reality must be acknowledged fully so they can cry the rivers that are appropriate. Only then can they collect themselves to realize that life goes on. Building bridges to the future is now the job at hand, to realize their resolve and get on the other side of life’s barriers and obstacles.

EXERCISE:

How can you fully acknowledge and experience all the emotions associated with some of your most significant challenges? How can you use that wisdom to garner the strength and capacities to build bridges and get over situations on your life journey?

“I remind myself every morning…”

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“I remind myself every morning: Nothing I say this day will teach me anything. So if I’m going to learn, I must do it by listening.”

—Larry King, American television and radio host

Image from Flickr by Ky Olsen

Image from Flickr by Ky Olsen

Have you ever considered why we have two ears and only one mouth? Why not one of each? Perhaps some higher power—not just Larry King—knew that listening is twice as valuable as speaking.

EXERCISE:

Practice using open-ended questions, including the all-powerful “What Else?” This follow-up & layering technique will help you speak less and learn more, at home and in your workplace.

 

“Patience is the Companion of Wisdom.”

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“Patience is the Companion of Wisdom.”

—St. Augustine, early Christian Theologian

Photo from Flickr by Thomas Mues

Photo from Flickr by Thomas Mues

When was the last time you watched a great leader give an inspiring speech? If you are like me, you occasionally enjoy a provocative TED Talk. The TED tagline is “Ideas Worth Spreading.”

Over the years, I’ve seen that the best leaders and presenters talk a bit more slowly than most. They measure their words carefully, to achieve the impact they desire. As I listen to them, I find myself slowing down, and leaning in to hear every morsel of wisdom they present.

EXERCISE:

Where would greater patience, and slowing down your busy life help you contribute and capture the wisdom of the moment?

“In seeking truth you have to get both sides of a story.”

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“In seeking truth you have to get both sides of a story.”

-Walter Cronkite, anchorman for the CBS Evening News for 19 years

Photo from Flicrk by NASAHQPhoto

Photo from Flickr by NASAHQPhoto

Perhaps no television news anchor has ever or will ever be respected and trusted as much as Walter Cronkite. Millions of people watched him each evening without fail, knowing his reports of the news would be objective, balanced, and trustworthy. As an inquisitive and thorough reporter, he knew there were always numerous views and perspectives on every topic, and successfully rooted out and communicated the truth — with candor and his unique brand of professionalism and humanity.

EXERCISE

How can you demonstrate your openness and receptivity to the many sides of the stories you hear professionally and personally, to do an even better job of seeking and discovering the truth you desire?

“You have to believe in yourself.”

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“You have to believe in yourself.”

– Sun Tzu, Chinese military general, strategist and philosopher

Photo from Flickr by Jennifer

Photo from Flickr by Jennifer

I am writing this post on a Sunday – the day many people practice their faith by attending church or another religious institution.

Many faiths believe that God created man and at the same time gave us free will and the ability to create our own lives through our beliefs and actions.

Central to our ability to manifest our world, Sun Tzu might suggest through this quote that a deeply held faith and belief in ourselves is essential.

EXERCISE:

Take note of the areas in your life where you have the strongest belief and faith, and notice what results you have achieved.

How would an even greater belief in yourself make the biggest difference in your personal or professional life?