“Don’t let the behavior of others destroy your inner peace.”

“Don’t let the behavior of others destroy your inner peace.”

—Gyalwa Rinpoche, the 14th Dalai Lama

Image from Unsplash by Shashank Sahay

Each tropical storm and hurricane season, meteorologists begin naming the weather events alphabetically, alternating between male and female names.

Who are the people in your life that create the stormiest weather and buffet you with their winds and waves?

What strategies do you use to deal with these disruptive people in order to remain calm and centered?

EXERCISE:

Take time today to notice the people in your world who exemplify the inner peace and calm you desire.

Consider asking them what they do to channel their inner Dalia Lama, then give some of their ideas a try.

“When elephants fight, it’s the grass that suffers.”

“When elephants fight, it’s the grass that suffers.”

—African proverb

Image from Unsplash by Jonathan Plugaru

Who are the elephants in your world? Take a look through your personal and professional communities. Look also beyond your immediate communities to national and global elephants that are throwing their weight around.

How are their skirmishes and all-out brawls impacting the grass and smaller, less powerful creatures beneath their feet? How much disruption, destruction, and scars are left that may never fully heal?

EXERCISE:

Where and how can you use the sunnier, milder days of the coming spring to calm the elephants in your world?

What actions can you take to reseed your world for all creatures to graze in peace?

Friday Review: Behavior

FRIDAY REVIEW: BEHAVIOR

What do your behaviors say about you? Here are a few behavior-related posts you may have missed.

 

“We have a tendency to want the other person to be a finished product while we give ourselves the grace to evolve.”

 

 

 

“A bad attitude is like a flat tire. You can’t go anywhere until you change it.”

 

 

 

“Throw me to the wolves and I will return leading the pack.”

 

 

 

 

 

“Did you ever wonder why no one ever tries softer?”

“Did you ever wonder why no one ever tries softer?”

—Lily Tomlin, American actress and comedian

Image from Unsplash by Max van den Oetelaar

If you keep up with books on personal and professional achievements, you will likely have seen an emphasis on deep work, drive, grit, leaning in, and discovering your strengths.

There is no question that hard work, persistence, the power of habit, and putting in those 10,000 hours is correlated with considerable progress and achievement.

EXERCISE:

What would trying softer look like?

How could this be an access point to a more successful and rewarding life?

Where would quieter behaviors and approaches to your relationships with yourself and others, and the general way you move through life, provide access to new personal and professional possibilities?

“There is no sense in crying over spilt milk. Why bewail what is done and cannot be recalled?”

“There is no sense in crying over spilt milk. Why bewail what is done and cannot be recalled?”

—Sophocles, 4th Century BC Greek Writer

Image from Unsplash by Daniela Diaz

Our delightful grandson Weston stayed with us recently to give his mom and dad a break, and give us a treat. He has a particularly robust appetite and often makes messes, as if many children were having a food fight.

With the latest and greatest in bottles and cups, the incidents of spilled milk have gone down considerably.

We all expect to deal with the messes made by young children, but how well do you deal with your own mistakes, or those of other grownups in your world?

How easy is it to accept these mishaps and move on rather than ruminating or beating yourself up?

EXERCISE:

Where and on what matters would a “Done is Done” approach to your day help you lead a calmer, more satisfying life?

No one wants to hear everything that’s in your head

“No one wants to hear everything that’s in your head. They just want you to live up to what comes out of your mouth.”

—Adam Grant, American psychologist and author

Image of a person holding a megaphone

Image from Unsplash by Clem Onojeghuo

Who are the blabbermouths in your life? Who are the people who go on and on about their ideas, beliefs, and opinions, and never seem to take a breath? How do you feel around them?

To what degree might people in your world place you on their list of those who are more focused on being interesting rather than interested?

What makes these individuals even more troublesome is that on many, if not most, occasions, they appear to be all talk and very little action.

EXERCISE:

Who are the people in your life who are impeccable with their words? How would your life be enhanced if you and others lived up to what comes out of your mouth more often?

Consider reading or re-reading The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz for some added wisdom on this topic.

Friday Review of Posts on Accountability

FRIDAY REVIEW: ACCOUNTABILITY

How do you hold yourself and others accountable? Here are a few accountability-related posts you may have missed. Click the links to read the full messages.

 

“Don’t ever stray away from yourself to get closer to someone else.”

 

 

 

“You cannot talk your way out of something you behaved yourself into.”

 

 

 

“Quarrels would not last long if the fault were only on one side.”

 

 

 

Man did not weave the web of life

“Man did not weave the web of life – he is merely a strand in it. Whatever he does to the web, he does to himself.”

—Greg Braden, NYT Best-Selling Author

Image of a large spider web

Image from Unsplash by Robert Anasch

If you happen to enjoy history, consider exploring the history of our planet and how animals and plant life have evolved. Consider checking out fossil records and other scientific methods including carbon dating.

A surprising discovery for many is just how recently man – especially modern man – has been around.

Humans, because of our remarkable brains and our ability to coordinate and cooperate, have altered our world far more quickly and dramatically than all other creatures combined.

EXERCISE:

What positive and negative strand-pulling activities are you observing these days? How and in what ways can all of us contribute and strengthen the web of life to leave a positive and lasting legacy for all future generations and all creatures that share our beautiful world?

Friday Review of Behavior

FRIDAY REVIEW: BEHAVIOR

What do your behaviors say about you? Here are a few behavior-related posts you may have missed. Click on the Quote to read the full message:

 

“Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.”

 

 

 

 

“Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds you plant.”

 

 

 

“When you want to fight fire with fire, remember that the fire department uses water.”

 

 

 

 

Don’t Blame the Shepherd

“If you are acting like a sheep, don’t blame the shepherd.”

—Eli Jaxon-Bear, American spiritual teacher and author

Image of a heard of sheep

Image from Unsplash by Sam Carter

Throughout our lives, we have been taught we have to “go along to get along.” Fitting in, being one of the gang, and literally being “with it” has made us sheep in many of our communities.

Take a moment to identify all the personal, professional, and community-based groups that herd us together. Consider all the new digital communities that foster similar practices and beliefs.

Where does being a sheep actually work for you and serve your best interest? Where does it clearly not support your most genuine self?

EXERCISE:

In what areas of your life is it time to act like a lion versus a lamb?

What bold, courageous or simply contrarian thing will you say or do to say goodbye to these shepherds?