“If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing it’s stupid.”

“If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing it’s stupid.”

– Albert Einstein, theoretical physicist

470Image from Flickr by phalinn.

A major paradox in goal achievement is the premise and practice of working to improve our weaknesses. We often spend too much time focusing on weaknesses at the expense of strengths. Who hasn’t, as a child, had a parent review their report card and make strong suggestions to improve the Ds and Cs toward As and Bs?

Unfortunately, this produces a double-whammy for the student. They usually lack the desire to work on these areas, and this parental feedback fosters their belief in their inadequacy and even stupidity regarding the subject.

Instead of working on our weaknesses, we will achieve much more by playing to our strengths and fanning the flames of a fire that’s already burning.

Exercise:

If fish gotta swim and birds gotta fly, what areas of natural talent and ability can you develop in yourself to realize your own genius?

Hope is a good breakfast

“Hope is a good breakfast but it is a bad supper.”

– Francis Bacon, English philosopher

Image of coffee and pastry breakfast

Image from Flickr by Kathryn Yengel

Starting each day with a hopeful mindset is very important – just as many nutritionists indicate that breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

If hope, however, is all we have to keep us going, we’ll feel that grumbling sound in our stomachs at supper time.

Exercise:

What other factors constitute the meals and fuel that keep you going throughout your day, to move you from hopeful intentions in the morning toward goal realization by bedtime?

Wait for the answer

“Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer.”

– William S. Burroughs, American writer

468Image from Flickr by anieto2k.

One of my favorite phrases about coaching is “coaches let their questions do the heavy lifting.” If this is true – and I assert that it is – then we can all coach others, be coached by others, and even coach ourselves. We need only ask the right questions, then relax as our answers reveal themselves.

It is through this personal inquiry that our question-answering muscles do the work and allow us to grow and evolve.

Exercise:

What one or two important questions do you need to ask and answer for yourself today?

“All art is autobiographical; the pearl is the oyster’s autobiography.”

“All art is autobiographical; the pearl is the oyster’s autobiography.”

– Federico Fellini, Italian film director and script writer

467Image from Flickr by InExtremiss

Recently, I attended a webinar on how to write a transformational book and earn beaucoup dollars before it’s even published. The webinar was chock-full of free tips and techniques … which eventually led to the not so free stuff!

Perhaps a key point from the speaker was that we each have a message, a story, and perhaps a best-selling book within us that needs expression. Our art – in this case, writing – needs to be expressed in its authenticity and full beauty.

Exercise:

Explore your own expressions of art in your life, whether they are professional or personal.  What autobiographical pearl can and will you offer the world?

“The true university of these days is a collection of books.”

“The true university of these days is a collection of books.”

– Thomas Carlyle, Scottish philosopher and writer

466Image from Flickr by Abee5.

Thomas Carlyle was born in 1795. He was a Scottish philosopher, satirical writer, essayist, historian and teacher during the Victorian era.

What do you think Carlyle’s quote might say if he lived today in the era of Google, mobile apps, and voice recognition software? He would undoubtedly have included blogs, audio, video and a host of other modalities from which to choose.

Exercise:

Consider watching the 1959 Twilight Zone episode “Time Enough at Last” where the main character, the coke-bottle-glasses wearing Henry Bemis, explores his voracious appetite to read and learn.

What are your preferred methods of educating yourself in this time of such variety?

How can you make a bit more time for your own pursuit of continuous learning and take a self-declared advanced degree in any subject you choose?

“Just because you’ve made mistakes doesn’t mean your mistakes get to make you.”

“Just because you’ve made mistakes doesn’t mean your mistakes get to make you. Take notice of your inner critic, forgive yourself, and move on.”

– Robert Tew465Image from Flickr by tuchodi.

A critical task in a coaching relationship is to significantly increase each client’s self-awareness. The phrase “wherever you go, there you are” sums it up pretty well.

You can never get away from yourself, and in many circumstances, the person you carry around with you can be a significant detractor from your own self-worth, effectiveness and overall well-being.

We as humans make mistakes all the time – that’s often how we learn and grow. Robert Tew suggests that these mistakes simply be noticed and that we move on and not labor the point.

Exercise:

The next time your “self-awareness muscle” spots a mistake, do as Tew suggests. Notice your inner critic, forgive yourself, and move on.

Consider partnering with a coach, mentor, friend, family member or work colleague to help you with this.

“At the end of the day, you can either focus on what’s tearing you apart or what’s holding you together.”

“At the end of the day, you can either focus on what’s tearing you apart or what’s holding you together.”

– Unknown

464Image from Flickr by Ira Gelb.

Where do you fit along the optimism – pessimism continuum? Are you a half-full or half-empty kind of person? For the purpose of living a happier, more fulfilling life, the answer matters quite a bit.

Some of the benefits of optimism include:

  • Increased longevity.
  • Increased spiritual development and enlightenment.
  • More positive, supportive relationships.
  • Greater strength and resolve in times of crisis and difficulty.
  • Reduced anxiety, frustration and worry.
  • Enhanced persistence, which is an essential trait required to achieve success.
  • Greater productivity, potentially leading to faster career progression.
  • Greater patience, and greater physiological and psychological well-being.

When we bring a more optimistic perspective to our limiting beliefs, we are far more likely to fully explore and engage our own innate capabilities and live a fuller, happier life.

Exercise:

To learn more about the power of optimism, please visit www.lifeoptimizer.org/2010/03/24/benefits-of-optimism.

You can also consider two books by Martin Seligman, Learned Optimism and Authentic Happiness.

If you only have time for a relatively quick read, pick up a copy of Happier by Tal Ben-Shahar. If you only have a minute to spare each day, keep reading and doing the exercises found in the The Quotable Coach series. 🙂

Finally, please consider spreading your optimistic perspective on life by sharing The Quotable Coach with others who could benefit. You could send them a link to your favorite quote at www.thequotablecoach.com.

clocks stop

“There are people whose clocks stop at a certain point in their lives.”

– Charles Augustin Sainte-Beuve, French literary critic

463Image from Flickr by oatsy40.

As I sit in my favorite chair writing this, it’s Sunday February 2nd. That’s right, it’s Groundhog Day.

But I’m not referring to that little furry creature, Punxsutawney Phil, or whether he saw his shadow. Instead, I want to describe the movie Groundhog Day, starring Bill Murray, which is a bit of a guilty pleasure for me.

If you’ve not seen the (ahem) “masterpiece,” the moral of the story is that until Phil Connors (Bill Murray) changes his ways, he will be destined to live a life that is making him a bit insane by being the same person he’s always been before – i.e. his clock has stopped.

Exercise:

How can you put a fresh battery in your life clock to make the very most of the time remaining to live life to its fullest?

“Some people, no matter how old they get, never lose their beauty –”

“Some people, no matter how old they get, never lose their beauty – they merely move it from their faces into their hearts.”

– Martin Buxbaum, American poet, author, and editor

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Image from Flickr by Mauro Cateb

This quote makes me think about my mother Rose who passed away two years ago. At family gatherings from time to time, we would break out the slide projector or photo albums and reminisce about the past. Of particular note was just how stunningly beautiful my mother was.

In her earlier years, all the young men wanted to date her. Luckily she chose my dad and they had a beautiful 62-year marriage together.

Exercise:

Who are some of the most beautiful people in your life that resonate with the quote above?

Feel free to reply to me and share your own Rose.

“With brains, heart and courage, you can achieve anything you desire.”

“With brains, heart and courage, you can achieve anything you desire.”

—Inspired by the Wizard of Oz

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Image from Flickr by twm1340

When I was a young boy, my family loved The Wizard of Oz. This movie, with its black and white to vivid color transition, amazed all of us with both the images and the compelling story.

If it’s one of your favorites too, you will recall Dorothy’s journey along with the Scarecrow, Tin Man and Cowardly Lion to reach the great and powerful Wizard of Oz.

Of course the story line also involves the Scarecrow discovering his brain, the Tin Man finding his heart, and the Lion embracing his courage.

Exercise:

What habits and practices can you develop and undertake in order to fully use your brain, heart and courage to fully achieve your greatest desires?