Tag Archives: Barry Demp

Be somebody who makes everybody feel like somebody

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“Be somebody who makes everybody feel like somebody.”

—Kid President (Robby Novak)

Image of "Kid President" Robby Novak

Who are the special people in your life who make you feel great just by being around them? Take a minute to investigate all of your personal and professional communities today, and even those in the past. Who are the special folks you look forward to seeing, with considerable anticipation and delight?

Now, what makes them so amazing? What unique qualities and super powers do they possess that are so magnetic and wonderful you can’t help but feel extra fantastic in their presence?

Among all the attributes you discovered, I bet one of them is that they focus most of their attention on those around them, and not on themselves.

EXERCISE:

How and where will you focus more of your daily efforts being somebody who makes everybody feel like somebody?

No amount of guilt can change the past

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“No amount of guilt can change the past, and no amount of worry can change the future.”

—Author Unknown

Image of a card stating "Mindfulness"

Image from Unspalsh by Lesly Juarez

The practices of guilt and worry are actually habits we form through our lives.

Close your eyes and look back in time at your upbringing under the influence of friends, family, school, religious institutions, the economy and the media, who always thrive on drama.

Take a few minutes to look also around your world as it exists today, and into the future to see what conversations or inner chatter occupies some or much of your thoughts.

Given that this line of thinking often results in frustration, exhaustion, uneasiness, and upset, ask yourself: How does my thinking this way help?

EXERCISE:

Assuming your answer to the question is “It Doesn’t,” what alternative strategies can you try to reduce or eliminate guilt and worry from your life?

Leave the familiar

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“Leave the familiar for a while. Change rooms in your mind for a day.”

—Hafiz, 14th Century Persian Poet

Image of a small boy walking on the beach

Image from Unsplash by Andre Mohamed

One of my favorite quotes is, “When patterns are broken, new worlds will emerge,” by Tuli Kupferberg. In a nutshell, it points to a primary reason the coaching process works to support all kinds of professional and personal change initiatives.

Unfortunately, this can be quite difficult due to entrenched ways of thinking and acting that have become habituated over many years.

The good news, supported through today’s quote, is that we all can begin to grow and change by taking baby steps rather than quantum leaps, to better our worlds.

EXERCISE:

Experiment today by intentionally deviating from the familiar in your thoughts and actions. Please consider replying to this post regarding what occurs when you change things up a bit.

Make visible what without you might never have been seen

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“Make visible what, without you, might never have been seen.”

—Robert Bresson, 20th Century French Film Director

Today’s quote reminds me of “Our Deepest Fear” by Marianne Williamson in her work A Return to Love. It is often incorrectly attributed to Nelson Mandela.

I thought sharing these words in their entirety might stir something in you, even if you are familiar with this wisdom.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

EXERCISE:

Where and how will you generously, courageously, and visibly contribute your unique and special qualities and talents to the world?

Friday Review Praise

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FRIDAY REVIEW: Praise

Praise packs a potent level of empowerment. Here are a few praise-related posts you may have missed. Click to read the full message.

 

“Rain and sun are to the flower as praise and encouragement are to the human spirit.”

 

 

 

“Praise does wonders for our sense of hearing.”

 

 

 

“There is no verbal vitamin more potent than praise.”

 

 

 

A Person Who Buys Excuses

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“A person who buys excuses will soon attempt to sell them to others.”

—Orrin Woodward, Author and Chairman of Board of Life

A wise coach once told me that no results and a good excuse still produced no results. What is your relationship with making or receiving excuses, personally or professionally?

For some it appears as a Get-Out-of-Jail Card, like in a Monopoly game, where we expect a free pass. For others it is to sail through obstacles or barriers simply because we had good intentions.

EXERCISE:

What would be the benefit or value of limiting or eliminating the buying and selling of excuses? In what specific situation or with what specific person could you begin this practice today?

Outer Order Contributes to Inner Calm

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“Outer order contributes to inner calm.”

—Gretchen Rubin, American Author and Speaker

Image of person in blue genie costume

image from YasminK

Consider the following life situations:

  • Finding something to wear in a cluttered closet
  • An e-mail or voice mail box filled to capacity
  • A dirty car, inside and out
  • Desperately needing a haircut
  • An unbalanced checkbook
  • Kids toys or clothing on the floor

Imagine having a genie, and that you can rub a lamp or snap your fingers and instantly all situations are in order. What happens to your heart rate, level of stress, or sense of general well-being?

EXERCISE:

Where would spending a little effort or even a bit of money bring greater order and a stronger calmness to your worlds?

Please also consider exploring the numerous resources available through Gretchen Rubin’s website.

The Law of Impermanence

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“Everything comes to pass; nothing comes to stay.”

—Matthew Flickstein, teacher of insight meditation

What do weekends, holidays, vacations, and happy times have in common?

What do colds, the flu, Mondays, and boring meetings have in common?

What does the first list have in common with the second?

If your answer was that they all come and go, do not last, or that, in mindfulness terms, they are impermanent, you are correct.

Whether you are happy that certain events occurred, or are sad they have come to an end, the law of impermanence is something of which you can be certain.

EXERCISE:

How can you apply the law of impermanence in your personal or professional worlds in the days and weeks ahead? How might that maximize the Ups and minimize the Downs of life?

Build a Future

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“Build a future – don’t just polish the past.”

—Author Unknown

New or Improved? Which of these words conveys the most energy for you?

Both words are often used in advertising and marketing to declare some advantage in a product or service category.

Where are you currently creating something new? In my observations, I see most people (including myself) maintaining the stats quo, simply polishing those things we have already done to brighten our lives a bit.

Creating something entirely new is often a messy process and can look like it is more trouble than it is worth due to the frustration and discouragement that can accompany the effort.

EXERCISE:

Where can and will you build a better future by creating something entirely new in either your personal or professional life, and not just polish your past?

Friday Review on Setbacks

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FRIDAY REVIEW: Setbacks

We all experience setbacks now and then. Here are a few setback-related posts you may have missed. Click to read the full message.

 

“Temporary setbacks boost your skill to open locks with previously unknown combinations.”

 

 

 

“Their ‘Can’t’ is my trumpet.”

 

 

 

“The darkest nights produce the brightest stars.”