Category Archives: Desire

The Gist of New Years Day

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“The gist of New Year’s Day is: Try Again.”

Frank Crane, 20th Century American Film Director

Image of a woman holding a calendar

Image from Unsplash by Brooke Lark

If you ever established a New Year’s Resolution and came up short, you are not alone.

Statistics show over 90% of people have the same experience.

Studies have shown that even when doctors tell heart patients they will die if they don’t change their habits, only one in seven will be able to follow through successfully.

It appears that desire and motivation aren’t enough, even when it is literally a matter of life or death.

It is also clear that the status quo has a pretty tight grip on what Roger Kegan calls The Immunity to Change.

What patterns of thinking and doing would have your “Try Again” efforts work this time?

EXERCISE:

Beyond limiting your focus on fewer priority objectives, consider adding a wide variety of social and structural supports to bolster your motivation and ability to succeed this time.

Don’t Wait Until You are Lost

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“Don’t wait until you are lost to evaluate where you are going.”

—Brendon Burchard, American Motivational Author

Image of a hand holding a compass

Image by Jamie Street on Unsplash

Are you a goal setter?

At this time of year, many of us take time to reflect over the past months to determine what we have achieved relative to our plans from last December.

If you are like many, you may have found yourself taking numerous detours or getting completely lost at some point along the way.

What are some of your own thoughts on ways to not wait until you are lost to evaluate where you are going?

EXERCISE:

Imagine you somehow could install your own goal-focused GPS system. How can you establish far more frequent check-ins and touch points to reach your most sincerely desired destinations in the year ahead?

Desire is half of life

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“Desire is half of life. Indifference is half of death.”

—Kahlil Gibran, 19th Century Lebanese Poet

Meme of today's quote

How do you feel when you are around enthusiastic, passionate, and excited people?

How do you feel when you are around people who lack energy, and pretty much don’t give a hoot about anything?

These groups of individuals act like booster shots or vampires in the way they create aliveness or deaden our worlds.

EXERCISE:

Where and in what ways can you build and fan the flames of desire to experience more of the aliveness you desire?

How can you lessen or completely eliminate the deadening quality of indifference from your world?

Consider partnering with a close friend, mentor, family member, or coach to support both of these intentions.

For everything you have missed you have gained something else

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“For everything you have missed, you have gained something else.”

—Ralph Waldo Emerson, 19th Century American Essayist

Book Cover Image

I have some bad news.

You can’t have it all, despite what the media and marketing industry tells you.

I also have an abiding faith that you can have many of the things you deeply desire if you recognize and embrace the concept John Maxwell calls the “Law of Trade-offs.”

As an example, I am an early-to-bed-early-to-rise kind of guy. Given this habit, I fully recognize that I miss late-night events many people relish for their daily efforts. What I gain is the rest and added vitality to wake up refreshed, go to the health club, and be fully present to the clients I am committed to serving.

EXERCISE:

Where can you apply the Law of Trade-offs to intentionally choose things you are willing to miss in order to gain even more of the things you value?

I Want People Who Have to Dance

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“I don’t want people who want to dance. I want people who have to dance.”

—George Balanchine, Founder of the New York City Ballet

Image of a Ballerina on a City Street

Photo by Kevin Lee on Unsplash

It is an unfortunate fact that some 70% of the working population doesn’t care much for the work they do.

Many would actually say they dread the thought of Monday morning, and rejoice in the “TGIF” theme song.

I consider this a tragedy for both employee and employer. A vast amount of time is spent in a spirit of boredom, apathy, regret, or just plain indifference. The accompanying lack of commitment, enthusiasm, and genuine passion for our work sometimes puts a dark cloud over our co-workers, and the organization as a whole.

EXERCISE:

What would be possible for you and your organization if you insisted on attracting people who absolutely have to dance?

Seek and you shall find

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“Seek and you shall find.”

-The Bible, from the Gospel of Matthew

Image from dpselfhelp.com

Image from dpselfhelp.com

When I explore possible quotes for The Quotable Coach series, I always consider impact, imagery, cleverness, and word length. Today’s quote from the Bible hit the mark on numerous fronts.

What are you looking for? Are things like success, peace of mind, balance, love, job satisfaction, and extraordinary relationships on your list?

If, for some reason, your greatest desires appear out of reach or elusive, consider the strategies you employ. One twist that often works magic is to give what you are seeking in order to find more of it for yourself.

EXERCISE:

Where and how can (and will) you passionately offer and generously share what you most sincerely desire?

what is possible

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“What is possible for you is dictated by your hunger, not your history.”

-Brendon Burchard, American Motivational Author

Image from playbuzz.com

Image from playbuzz.com

A few weeks ago, I had an engaging breakfast meeting with a friend who is applying for a new, high profile position. He expects to be vying for this job with a good number of other people.

Through our discussion and inquiry, we fueled the flame of his hunger for this position. He was clear that, based on his history and experience, he was highly qualified for the role. He also saw this position as the role of a lifetime, and that attaining it was his professional destiny.

EXERCISE:

How likely do you think it is that the interviewers will sense his genuine hunger and passion for the position and put him at or near the top of the list?

Where can you use your own insatiable hunger – not just your history – to achieve your deeply held desires?

Reclaim Our Life

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“We must reclaim our life agenda once more.”

-Brendon Burchard, American Motivational Author

QC #0186

Image from Flickr by Roland Urbanek

One of the most fundamental elements of people leading full and satisfying lives is autonomy, or as some might say, the ability to guide and direct our own lives.

For many, the ability to chart our own life course has been taken over, or at least overshadowed, by the professional and personal communities within which we operate.
One simple self-test to see if this is true for you is to examine how often your inner voice says, “I don’t want to…” when you are asked to do something.

EXERCISE:

How and in what small or big ways can you reclaim your own life agenda, to lead a fuller, more satisfying life?

“Give ‘em the Pickle.”

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“Give ‘em the Pickle.”

-Bob Farrell, American motivational speaker

Bob Farrell, Author of "Give 'em the Pickle!"

Bob Farrell, Author of “Give ’em the Pickle!”

About a month ago, while traveling to a coaching conference, I received a pearl of advice from a flight attendant with whom I had shared The Quotable Coach daily blog.

She mentioned that the airline loves positive, affirming thinking, and that I should consider looking into today’s quote.

Turns out, “Give ‘em the pickle” is all about exemplary customer service and going the extra mile to create customer evangelists, and optimal loyalty. This is especially important given the almost unlimited choices people have as consumers.

EXERCISE:

Check out this short YouTube video. Ask and answer this question, for yourself and your organization: What represents that special, tasty pickle you can offer to more fully satisfy and delight your customers? What about those in your personal worlds?