“Just because you’ve made mistakes doesn’t mean your mistakes get to make you.”

Posted on by

“Just because you’ve made mistakes doesn’t mean your mistakes get to make you. Take notice of your inner critic, forgive yourself, and move on.”

– Robert Tew465Image from Flickr by tuchodi.

A critical task in a coaching relationship is to significantly increase each client’s self-awareness. The phrase “wherever you go, there you are” sums it up pretty well.

You can never get away from yourself, and in many circumstances, the person you carry around with you can be a significant detractor from your own self-worth, effectiveness and overall well-being.

We as humans make mistakes all the time – that’s often how we learn and grow. Robert Tew suggests that these mistakes simply be noticed and that we move on and not labor the point.

Exercise:

The next time your “self-awareness muscle” spots a mistake, do as Tew suggests. Notice your inner critic, forgive yourself, and move on.

Consider partnering with a coach, mentor, friend, family member or work colleague to help you with this.

“At the end of the day, you can either focus on what’s tearing you apart or what’s holding you together.”

Posted on by

“At the end of the day, you can either focus on what’s tearing you apart or what’s holding you together.”

– Unknown

464Image from Flickr by Ira Gelb.

Where do you fit along the optimism – pessimism continuum? Are you a half-full or half-empty kind of person? For the purpose of living a happier, more fulfilling life, the answer matters quite a bit.

Some of the benefits of optimism include:

  • Increased longevity.
  • Increased spiritual development and enlightenment.
  • More positive, supportive relationships.
  • Greater strength and resolve in times of crisis and difficulty.
  • Reduced anxiety, frustration and worry.
  • Enhanced persistence, which is an essential trait required to achieve success.
  • Greater productivity, potentially leading to faster career progression.
  • Greater patience, and greater physiological and psychological well-being.

When we bring a more optimistic perspective to our limiting beliefs, we are far more likely to fully explore and engage our own innate capabilities and live a fuller, happier life.

Exercise:

To learn more about the power of optimism, please visit www.lifeoptimizer.org/2010/03/24/benefits-of-optimism.

You can also consider two books by Martin Seligman, Learned Optimism and Authentic Happiness.

If you only have time for a relatively quick read, pick up a copy of Happier by Tal Ben-Shahar. If you only have a minute to spare each day, keep reading and doing the exercises found in the The Quotable Coach series. 🙂

Finally, please consider spreading your optimistic perspective on life by sharing The Quotable Coach with others who could benefit. You could send them a link to your favorite quote at www.thequotablecoach.com.

clocks stop

Posted on by

“There are people whose clocks stop at a certain point in their lives.”

– Charles Augustin Sainte-Beuve, French literary critic

463Image from Flickr by oatsy40.

As I sit in my favorite chair writing this, it’s Sunday February 2nd. That’s right, it’s Groundhog Day.

But I’m not referring to that little furry creature, Punxsutawney Phil, or whether he saw his shadow. Instead, I want to describe the movie Groundhog Day, starring Bill Murray, which is a bit of a guilty pleasure for me.

If you’ve not seen the (ahem) “masterpiece,” the moral of the story is that until Phil Connors (Bill Murray) changes his ways, he will be destined to live a life that is making him a bit insane by being the same person he’s always been before – i.e. his clock has stopped.

Exercise:

How can you put a fresh battery in your life clock to make the very most of the time remaining to live life to its fullest?

“Some people, no matter how old they get, never lose their beauty –”

Posted on by

“Some people, no matter how old they get, never lose their beauty – they merely move it from their faces into their hearts.”

– Martin Buxbaum, American poet, author, and editor

462

Image from Flickr by Mauro Cateb

This quote makes me think about my mother Rose who passed away two years ago. At family gatherings from time to time, we would break out the slide projector or photo albums and reminisce about the past. Of particular note was just how stunningly beautiful my mother was.

In her earlier years, all the young men wanted to date her. Luckily she chose my dad and they had a beautiful 62-year marriage together.

Exercise:

Who are some of the most beautiful people in your life that resonate with the quote above?

Feel free to reply to me and share your own Rose.

“With brains, heart and courage, you can achieve anything you desire.”

Posted on by

“With brains, heart and courage, you can achieve anything you desire.”

—Inspired by the Wizard of Oz

461

Image from Flickr by twm1340

When I was a young boy, my family loved The Wizard of Oz. This movie, with its black and white to vivid color transition, amazed all of us with both the images and the compelling story.

If it’s one of your favorites too, you will recall Dorothy’s journey along with the Scarecrow, Tin Man and Cowardly Lion to reach the great and powerful Wizard of Oz.

Of course the story line also involves the Scarecrow discovering his brain, the Tin Man finding his heart, and the Lion embracing his courage.

Exercise:

What habits and practices can you develop and undertake in order to fully use your brain, heart and courage to fully achieve your greatest desires?

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”

Posted on by

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”

– C.S. Lewis (attrib.), author of the Narnia books

460Image from Flickr by soupboy.

With the Olympic Games in Sochi taking place right now, I was curious to learn the age of some of the oldest athletes. Among some interesting anecdotes, I learned about Ann Abernathy who was called “Grandma Luge” for her participation in the 1988 Calgary Games, the 1992 Barcelona Games, the 1994 Lillehammer games, the 1998 Nagano Games, the 2002 Salt Lake City games and the 2006 games in Turin.

In her final Olympics she wore a red helmet to honor women over 50 that go out and do what they want to do.

The commentator on her final games called her “Nonna Olympia” or “Grandma Olympics” and in a ceremony at the Olympic Village, the Major presented Ann with an Olympic Torch in honor of her achievement.

Exercise:

What goal have you yet to set, or dream have you yet to dream, because you think you’re too old or it’s too late?

“A balanced diet is a chocolate in each hand.”

Posted on by

“A balanced diet is a chocolate in each hand.”

– Unknown

459Image from Flickr by JohnSeb

Chocolate is considered a superfood with about five out of seven people worldwide enjoying it very much. I am one of them!

Below are some interesting facts to consider when enjoying this treat. (Some people believe it should even be its own food group…)

  • It can decrease the risk of stroke.
  • It can boost heart health.
  • It can fill you up and keep you full so you don’t overeat (!)
  • It may reduce the risk of diabetes.
  • It may offer protection from UV rays and skin damage.
  • It can quiet a cough.
  • It can boost your mood – it does mine.
  • It can improve blood flow.
  • It can enhance your vision.
  • It can even boost your brainpower and make you smarter.

Exercise:

For those of you who enjoy it too, look for ways to moderately include chocolate in your life to make it a bit sweeter.

To learn more, check out the Huffington Post article “10 Health Benefits of Chocolate” at the link below:

www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/03/28/chocolate-health-benefits_n_1383372.html

Perhaps you could even give a gift of chocolate to someone you love. Valentine’s Day is just around the corner…

“The Olympic Games are the quadrennial celebration of the springtime of humanity.”

Posted on by

“The Olympic Games are the quadrennial celebration of the springtime of humanity.”

– Pierre de Coubertin, founder of the modern Olympic Games

457Image from Flickr by Jon Curnow.

As much as the Olympics is a coming-together of the best athletes in the world, it is also about the world coming together to celebrate our collective humanity.

Exercise:

With the winter games beginning, how can you bring your own Olympic spirit to your various communities to foster and celebrate your own springtime of humanity?

“The most important thing in the Olympic Games is not winning…”

Posted on by

“The most important thing in the Olympic Games is not winning but taking part; the essential thing in life is not conquering but fighting well.”

– Pierre de Coubertin, founder of the modern Olympic Games

458Image from Flickr by Jodimu

The 1992 Olympic Games inspired me to pursue coaching as a career. Beyond gold medal individual achievement, it is the fundamental pursuit of excellence that drives me. I also enjoy how, in many different ways, the Olympics is a wonderful expression of my life vision as described below:

My life vision is a healthy, peaceful, beautiful world of extraordinary relationships, great accomplishments, and integrity; an exciting world of respect, dignity, leadership, courage, and honor, where all people generously and passionately contribute their best to one another.

(You can find out more about my vision, mission and coaching philosophy here: www.dempcoaching.com/my-coaching-philosophy.)

Exercise:

If you happen to also be a champion of the “Olympic Spirit”, consider replying to let me know what the Games mean to you.

Getting Re-Motivated in the Journey Toward Your Goals

Posted on by

This is an excerpt from my appearance on BlogTalkRadio’s show On the Dean’s List, with host Dean la Douceur.

In this five minute clip, Dean and I talk about:

  • Hitting a plateau in your journey toward your goals – and what you can do about it.
  • The concept of “creative tension” and what this means when you’re stuck at a plateau.
  • Exploring a new vision for the future to re-motivate you.
  • What to do when the people around you are uncomfortable with you changing.
  • The book Influencer: The Power to Change Anything and the power of different types of support.

Simply click below to play the audio file:

[audio:http://www.dempcoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/Barry-Demp-Deans-List-4.mp3|titles=Barry Demp, “On the Dean’s List”]

If you’d like to hear the whole of my interview with Dean la Douceur (37 minutes), please click here to visit the Podcasts page on my Barry Demp Coaching website. You can listen to it online or download it.