The Great Art

Posted on March 2, 2016 by Barry

“Silence is one of the great arts of conversation.”

-Hanna More, 19th Century British Philanthropist

Image from Flickr by Shawn Harquail

Many people think of silence as simply the lack of saying something. It is a void, an empty space where nothing is happening.

Today’s quote asks us to instead consider silence as a seed, invisibly planted in the ground. Active listening and sincere interest are resources that help conversation and ideas grow and eventually blossom.

EXERCISE:

How can you use the art of silence to enhance and grow your most important personal and professional relationships?

Even If I Failed

Posted on March 1, 2016 by Barry

“What would I be glad I did, even if I failed?”

-Brene Brown, American Author & Scholar

Image from Flickr by Classic Film

Many people celebrated Frank Sinatra’s 100th birthday this past December. In his famous song, “My Way,” – written for him by Paul Anka – Sinatra sings the phrase “Regrets – I’ve had a few.”

For many of us, regret is a common occurrence, since they are almost always associated with things we didn’t do rather than the things we did.

It is amazing the feeling we experience by simply summoning the courage to try something, even if it doesn’t work out. Somehow it is in the attempting of something new that we bolster our own self confidence and self worth.

EXERCISE:

What are you going to try today or this week that will make you glad even if you fail? What might it be like if you continued trying until you succeed?

The Last Page

Posted on February 29, 2016 by Barry

“Read the last page first.”

-Nora Ephron, American Journalist and Screenwriter

image from novelideareviews.com

I never could understand why someone would ruin the story by reading the end of a book first. For me it was like being given the punch line to a joke without the story that led to it.

From a coach’s perspective, however, “reading the last page” can be highly useful.

Consider the process of envisioning a new and better personal and professional future. In this process, you would likely be asked to generate written visions, missions, and goals that represent the happy-ever-after future you desire. At that point, you can reverse engineer the measurable results and action steps that will lead you there.

EXERCISE:

How can reading the last page first on your most important professional and personal life stories act as a catalyst to make more of your dreams come true?

Friday Review: Aspirations

Posted on February 26, 2016 by Barry

Friday Review: Aspirations

What are your aspirations for your personal or professional life? Here are a few aspiration-related posts you may have missed. Click on the Quote to read the full message:

Image from Flickr by Tommy Clark

“Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them and try to follow where they lead.”

Image from Nasa

“I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart.”

Image from picturespider.com

“Be the kind of person you want in your life.”

Why You Started

Posted on February 25, 2016 by Barry

“Remember Why You Started.”

-Author Unknown

Image from family-180.com

We are now almost two months into the new year, which is a good time to check in, revisit resolutions and key goals, and your most desired intentions.

How are things going?

See if you are exceeding expectations, are satisfied, somewhat satisfied, a bit stalled, or even at a dead stop.

Did you do what many people do by simply taking on too many things at one time? If you did, consider paring down the list to the one thing you most desire, and remind yourself why it is your top priority.

Examine this goal with your head, your heart, and your gut, to rekindle its importance and value. Some might suggest “your why should make you cry.”

EXERCISE:

With this renewed commitment in place, please devise an unstoppable and fully guaranteed plan of action in which you will use all the resources and support structures available to remember why you started, and to finish strong.

You Have to Squint

Posted on February 24, 2016 by Barry

“See the good all around you even if you have to squint.”

-Author Unknown

Image from lasikmd.com

If you are like me, your eyesight is not what it used to be. Perhaps you need glasses to drive at night, or to read. You may even need longer arms as you “trombone” food labels in order to read the ingredient list.

Having 20/20 vision has great benefits, but when we look at the world, including the folks in our lives that are taking this journey with us, it may not always serve us to have clear and complete objectivity. As an example, as we look at the weaknesses and faults in others, we know full well we have our own share.

EXERCISE:

Where would a bit of squinting help you overlook some of the unimportant things around you, and help you see a lot more good available in your world?

Be Nice

Posted on February 23, 2016 by Barry

“To thine own self be nice.”

-Author Unknown

Image from choosetobenice.com

A critical component of all coaching relationships is to significantly increase each individual’s self awareness. To achieve this, various strategies can be utilized, including a wide variety of assessments, interviews with colleagues, family, and friends, and of course, discussions with the clients themselves.

Through these efforts, behavioral achievement, cognitive and leadership traits can be evaluated. Greater insights are also revealed about their beliefs, attitudes, values, and perspectives on themselves and the world around them.

One surprising observation I’ve made over the years is just how many people demonstrate a more critical view of themselves than of others. For some reason, they demonstrate an “I am not enough/not good enough” attitude, which is obviously self-limiting.

EXERCISE:

How would a “To thine own self be nice, accepting, and more loving” approach make a meaningful difference in your life or the lives of others you care about?

I Have Hope

Posted on February 22, 2016 by Barry

“I have hope and I’m not afraid to use it.”

-Author Unknown

Image from porsperityconnection.org

One of the top qualities I look for in my coaching clients is optimism—a hopeful perspective on life. Through an unscientific evaluation, I have found that such individuals are generally more successful and far more satisfied with their efforts and progress. They are also far more enjoyable to be around.

Fearful and pessimistic individuals, on the other hand, tend to look through the lens of what is wrong or what won’t work, and therefore, stop themselves or avoid attempting new pursuits where failure is possible.

They often see even good things that happen to them as temporary or a “fluke,” as opposed to the hopeful people who see setbacks as only temporary.

EXERCISE:

How would an even more hopeful perspective on life help you achieve better results and attract more wonderful, equally hopeful people into your world?

Friday Review: Breakthroughs

Posted on February 19, 2016 by Barry

Friday Review: Breakthroughs

Click on the links to read the full message on these posts related to breakthroughs.

Image from Flickr by Eric Lockhart

“The worst walls are never the ones you find in your way. The worst walls are the ones you put there – you build yourself.”

QC #971b

“Our business in life is not to get ahead of others but to get ahead of ourselves, to break our own records, to outstrip our yesterday by outperforming today.”

“If an egg is broken by outside force, life ends. If broken by inside force, life begins. Great things always begin from inside.”

Wiser To Find Out

Posted on February 18, 2016 by Barry

“It is wiser to find out than to suppose.”

-Samuel Clemens, writing as Mark Twain

When in doubt

Many years ago I read the book Fierce Conversations by Susan Scott. One of the most significant take-aways from her work was the idea that all conversations are first with ourselves, and sometimes they include others.

In fact, the prefix, “con” means “with” or “together,” and thus a conversation actually includes others. Susan Scott would suggest that what we often have are “versations” with ourselves, without ever reaching out to get the other person’s perspective. We simply suppose or “ass-u-me” we know what the other person is going to say or how they will likely respond. We all know about what assuming can cause.

EXERCISE:

How can you make a wiser choice by using a “when in doubt check it out” strategy in more of your interactions today?