The past is a place of reference, not a residence

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“The past is a place of reference, not a residence. The past is a place of learning, not a place of living.”

—Roy T. Bennett, Late Author of The Light in the Heart

Image from Unsplash by Shantung Kulkarni

Our minds are marvelous. In a split second we can use our imagination to go anywhere and do anything.

By working at the speed of light and beyond, we can use mental worm holes and folds in spacetime to explore our limitless inner and outer worlds.

Another handy trick is our ability to go back in time or into the future whenever we wish.

Although daydreaming about the future and how our life may unfold is common, trips down memory lane seem to be even more prominent, since these roads have already been traveled.

Unfortunately, all this mental leaping can have us miss the very moments that make up these memories we hope to reflect upon down the road.

EXERCISE:

How much of your life do you spend residing in the past?

What lessons have you learned to make sure you prioritize opening the gifts of the present?

Sometimes, to keep going, we have to allow ourselves to stop.

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“Sometimes, to keep going, we have to allow ourselves to stop.”

—Gretchen Rubin, NY Times Bestselling Author, Podcaster, Speaker

Image from Unsplash by Shane

It wasn’t until I had grandchildren that I learned “happy hour” was a new definition for a nap.

Regardless of my meditation practices, exercise efforts, and nutritional pursuits with the latest super foods, just a handful of hours with our two little ones drains most of the pep from my steps.

With some adjustments to our schedules, we have found ways to include the kids in some of our renewal and recharging efforts, including lots of quiet cuddling with pop-pop and grand-mom.

EXERCISE:

Where and when in your life do you feel the greatest need to stop in order to keep going?

How can you monitor and manage your energy levels to optimize your intentions and actions?

Consider picking up a copy of The Power of Full Engagement if this post resonates.

“If you can’t pay it back, pay it forward.”

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“If you can’t pay it back, pay it forward.”

—Catherine Ryan Hyde, American novelist and short story writer

Image from Unsplash by Ekaterina Shakharova

Who are the people who have invested the most in you over the years?

How did they spend their time, energy, and resources to help you become the person you are today?

In what ways did you repay them for their invaluable contributions?

When I examine my own list, I sometime feel unsettled.

A good number of my teachers, mentors, advisors, and family members are no longer with us. Simply sending my prayers and feelings of gratitude into the domain of spirit doesn’t seem to be enough.

Upon deeper review, I realized that these special individuals probably never expected anything in return. They would probably be very pleased to see me paying many of their lessons forward to others in my communities.

EXERCISE:

Where and with whom would a pay it forward strategy help you balance the ledger of your life for all that you have received from others over the years?

Your mind is like a bookshelf

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Your mind is like a bookshelf. You can browse the titles without opening them all.

—Calm App Reflection

Image from Unsplash by Patel Czerwinski

What’s on your mind these days?

How many open tabs, apps, and pages have some or most of your attention? How does jumping from one thing to another at the speed of thought make you feel?

When was the last time you visited an actual book store or library? What was it like to browse through the shelves at a leisurely pace?

How many books did you select and actually open to see if the contents were worth a longer look?

EXERCISE:

How would patiently browsing through the bookshelf of your mind help you be far more discerning with what you let into the library of your life?

The best way to change the world is in concentric circles

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“The best way to change the world is in concentric circles; start with yourself and work your way out from there.”

—James Clear, author of Atomic Habits

Image from Unsplash by Pablò

Whenever I think of concentric circles I see an archery target.

As a kid, I had the terrific opportunity to go to Camp Indian Lake in the Pocono Mountains of Pennsylvania every summer.

Archery was a skill we all had the chance to experience. Drawing the bow and setting our sights on the bullseye was always the goal, and no one ever got hurt.

Today, the thought of giving a bunch of 10-year-olds bows and arrows seems pretty crazy!

As an adult, playing darts fits nicely in this concentric circle concept, where the spokes and areas beyond the bullseye come into play.

EXERCISE:

How can you change the world by applying this concentric circle idea to yourself and the world around you?

As soon as I have a deadline, I work much better

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“As soon as I have a deadline, I work much better. Time unbounded is hard to handle.”

—May Sarton, pen name of Eleanore Marie Sarton, 20th century novelist, poet, memoirist

Image from Unsplash by Markus Winkler

To what degree do you experience deadlines in your personal and professional lives?

How do time constraints impact your engagement and performance?

Where do they help you step up your game, or act as negative stressors that crush your spirit?

EXERCISE:

How does having unbounded time impact your life?

Where is the sweet spot between eustress and distress as it relates to setting deadlines for yourself?

 

“Buying your kids the best will never replace giving your kids your best.”

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“Buying your kids the best will never replace giving your kids your best.”

—James Clear, author of Atomic Habits

Image from Unsplash by Juliane Liebermann

A few weeks ago, we celebrated my grandson’s fifth birthday. In many ways, our multi-day extravaganza reminded me of places like Disney World, where they celebrate significant milestone events for an entire year.

I also related this series of events to the 5 Love Languages concept I’ve referenced numerous times over the years.

Although there was an abundance of gift-giving during these days, I took great pleasure in the countless expressions of quality time, words of affirmation, and physical touch offered by both family and friends.

EXERCISE:

How do you show your love to those close to you?

In what ways do you make it a priority to give them the things money can’t buy?

When we practice mindfulness, we are learning to be a hero of consciousness

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When we practice mindfulness, we are learning to be a hero of consciousness.

—Calm App Reflection

Image from Unsplash by Ashley Batz

What come to mind when you think of a hero? For many people, it can involve risking one’s own life to save another. The media loves displaying such acts, and most of us secretly shudder at the thought of actually being in the place of these brave men and women.

What if you could be a hero of consciousness, where the person you were saving was yourself?

How could your own mindfulness practices be a catalyst for bolder and more generous contributions to yourself and others without risking life and limb?

EXERCISE:

Declare yourself a hero of consciousness. Reading this post and the many other actions you take to better yourself in support of others warrants a big pat on the back and a hearty handshake.