To Have What You Want

Posted on March 30, 2016 by Barry

“To have what you want, don’t want it—give it.”

-Author Unknown

Image from Flickr by Alvanman

A dozen years ago The Secret was all the rage. Wherever you looked in bookstores, on the internet, and on Oprah, everyone wanted to master the secret to a happier life. Many also referred to it as the Law of Attraction, which is inherent in phrases like, “what you think about comes about.”

Today’s quote puts a bit of spin on this idea in that it suggests we simply need to give what we want to get.

Consider this list of the things most people want, and perhaps add a few of your own:

Love	Respect	Praise	Trust
Loyalty	Joy	Happiness	Pleasure
Wealth	Adventure	Achievement	Acknowledgement
Health	Peace	Friendship	Encouragement

EXERCISE:

How and where can you get far more of what you want by generously giving it to others? With whom could you begin this practice today?

“One must dare to be happy”

Posted on March 29, 2016 by Barry

“One must dare to be happy.”

-Gertrude Stein, American novelist, poet, and playwright

Image from Flickr by Blondinrikard Froberg

If I double-dared you, would you be doubly happy? The relationship between risk and reward is a topic of interest to many. Stories abound in the media, especially when you examine people who have achieved great wealth or who have lost everything—sometimes repeatedly.

But what about happiness? How does an orientation to risk-taking correlate to moving the needle on the happy meter? This idea fits perfectly with the concept of coaching, in which an individual acknowledges a personal or professional future they wish to realize.

To do so, however, requires taking the risk of leaving their current, often safe and secure realities for some more desired vision they see for themselves. Not to do so is considered by many the biggest reason for a life of regret, which no one would desire.

EXERCISE:

Where and in what ways could you take a more daring approach to your days, to lead a more interesting, exciting, and happier life?

Consider picking up a copy of Happier by Tal Ben-Shahar to examine other ideas to pursue greater happiness.

From ME to WE

Posted on March 28, 2016 by Barry

“I’m not interested in competing with anyone. I hope we all make it.”

-Erica Cook, Interior Designer and Blogger

QC #997
A few weekends ago my wife Wendy and I watched the movie, Where to Invade Next, in which Michael Moore compared the views of people from many countries regarding education, healthcare, equality, and business, to those of Americans.

His journey to explore a wide variety of routes to success and bring them back to America was fascinating. He discovered—surprisingly—that there are many ways to succeed that seem contrary to what one might think.

A significant take-away for me was the many examples of happiness and success in which collective achievements and the care of everyone within the community was paramount.

EXERCISE:

Where would a shift from a “ME” perspective to a “WE” approach make the biggest difference in either your personal or professional worlds?

Friday Review: Enthusiasm

Posted on March 25, 2016 by Barry

Friday Review: Enthusiasm

How enthusiastic are you as you go about your day? Here are a few commitment-related posts you may have missed. Click on the Quote to read the full message:

“You can do anything if you have enthusiasm. Enthusiasm is the yeast that makes your hope rise to the stars.”

“Though you can love what you do not master, you cannot master what you do not love.”

“Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.”

All of us are Smarter

Posted on March 24, 2016 by Barry

“All of us are smarter than any of us.”

-Douglas Merrill, Organizational Guru

Image from teamworkandleadership.com

Today’s quote got me thinking about teamwork and Patrick Lencioni’s book, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team. In this leadership fable, Lencioni tells the story of an imaginary technology company struggling to grow and secure new customers.

Three key take-aways from this book will almost certainly make today’s quote true. In most cases, if the group of individuals does not demonstrate these characteristics, there may be good reason for going it alone:

Team members engender trust in one another by being vulnerable and open.
Healthy teams encourage respectful debate and dialogue to reach optimal decisions.
Team environments in which everyone’s ideas and thoughts are considered almost always generate heightened levels of buy-in and mutual commitment.

EXERCISE:

How and where can you foster enhanced teamwork to optimize the collective smarts of the groups with which you work?

Productive, not Busy

Posted on March 23, 2016 by Barry

“Focus on being productive instead of busy.”

-Tim Ferris, author & Entrepreneur

QC #994

Over the past few weeks I learned about a new book by Cal Newport titled Deep Work—Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World.

In this timely book, Cal shares his formula for high productivity:

High quality work produced = (time spent X intensity of focus)

Take a moment to examine your typical work day with regard to this equation.

Where does your time go?

How much intensity do you focus on each of your important and unimportant tasks?

EXERCISE:

How and in what ways would blocking out larger chunks of quality time when you are operating at optimal intensity increase your productivity today?

Your Own Wikipedia Page

Posted on March 22, 2016 by Barry

“Don’t stop until you have a Wikipedia page in your name.”

-Author Unknown

Image from wikipedia.org

I am in the final stages of working on a chapter on Personal Mastery for a new book. Wikipedia is among the variety of resources I’ve used to research this topic.

Learning about the lives of current and past masters is so easy when all we have to do is enter a few keystrokes into a search engine.

Today’s quote, however, challenges us to examine our personal and professional journeys to see what significant or even remarkable progress we wish to make today and in the future.

EXERCISE:

As a playful experiment, write out a draft Wikipedia post on yourself for today, a year from now, and perhaps 5 to 10 years in the future.

What added content would you like other people to contribute to this open-source profile on you and your life?

Thousands of Tiny Miracles

Posted on March 21, 2016 by Barry

“Life is a series of thousands of tiny miracles. Notice them.”

-Author Unknown

Image from Flickr by JOPHIELsmiles

In late February, my wife Wendy took a week to visit her friends in Florida and I stayed back here in Michigan to hold down the fort. Although I missed her dearly and we talked often, I became very aware of a different life rhythm, and other experiences not previously observed in our normal routines.

Miracles I noticed and am grateful for include:

The wonders of medicine and our healthcare system in improving the quality and quantity of life.
The electronic and technological capacities that our smartphones, the internet, and a host of other devices provide.
The miracle of our living planet and the huge diversity of living creatures that share it.
The miracle of our minds and bodies that allow us to design and impact our world.
The miracle of community and family in which we can share our journey with those we love and care about.

EXERCISE:

Feel free to reply to this post regarding some of the small and not so small miracles you observe today.

Friday Review: Determination

Posted on March 18, 2016 by Barry

Friday Review: Determination

What are you determined to do or change? Here are a few determination-related posts you may have missed. Click on the Quote to read the full message:

“If you take another step, and another, you will be surprised to know how far you can go from the point you thought was the end.”

“The most interesting thing about a postage stamp is the persistence with which it sticks to its job.”

“A lot can happen in a year.”

The Best View

Posted on March 17, 2016 by Barry

“The best view comes after the hardest climb.”

-Author Unknown

Image from emilykjesbo.blogspot.com

When I started my coaching career many years ago, my wife Wendy gave me the gift of a customized license plate that reads “I Coach.” Over the years it has become a conversation starter, with people often asking me what sport I coach.

This leads to a discussion of my role as a business and personal coach. Recently, I noticed that in all these years I have never coached a professional or even top amateur athlete.

This means that there have also been no actual mountain climbers, but we all climb metaphorical mountains every day. Surprisingly, the bigger and more daunting the climb, the more satisfied and rewarded we feel when we reach the summit.

EXERCISE:

What challenging projects or goals are you pursuing these days? How can you more fully experience the growth satisfaction along the way as well as the wonderful views when you reach the top?