Everything you Think

Posted on April 28, 2015 by Barry

“Don’t believe everything you think.”

—Allan Lokos, founder of the Community Meditation Center in New York City

Photo from Flickr by Karen Neoh

I’m sure we’ve all heard the phrase, “Don’t believe everything you hear.” Over the years, most of us have learned to take much of what we hear or read with the proverbial grain of salt.

At some point however, we decide what we are going to internalize and cement within us as truth. This choosing, whether intentional or perhaps mostly unconscious, can be useful and at the same time, limiting. Usually, these thoughts help us navigate our world efficiently and effectively, supporting a form of life momentum.

Alternatively, sometimes our thinking simply doesn’t work or serve us in certain situations.

EXERCISE:

Take out a piece of paper or Post-it Note, and write the following questions:

How does my current thinking help or hurt this situation?
What alternative thoughts would generate even more work-ability?

If you have been reading The Quotable Coach series for some time, you may know that Edward DeBono’s The Six Thinking Hats is a resource I refer to frequently.

Trust when the answer is no

Posted on April 27, 2015 by Barry

“Trust that when the answer is ‘no,’ there’s a better ‘yes’ down the road.”

—Author unknown

Photo from Flickr by Abhi

Many people are familiar with the story of Thomas Edison’s 10,000-plus unsuccessful attempts to create the light bulb. His philosophy on such a high volume of failures was that the world was simply saying ‘no’ to the most recent attempt. He is quoted as saying, “I never failed. I only found 10,000 ways in which it did not work.”

Undaunted, he persisted in his efforts, always seeing a better way and getting to a ‘yes’ that would eventually light the world.

EXERCISE:

Where in your own life are you receiving your share of No’s?

How often do the No’s stop you? How often do they spur you on in faith, knowing that the better Yes’s of life may simply be a bit further down the road?

“Don’t step over dollars to pick up a dime.”

Posted on April 24, 2015 by Barry

“Don’t step over dollars to pick up a dime.”

—Author Unknown

Photo from Flickr by Chaval Brasil

Imagine you are in a room and suddenly a shower of money in all denominations falls from the ceiling. You happen to have an umbrella and open it quickly to avoid the downpour of coins clunking you on the head.

The financial storm comes to a halt after a few minutes, and you are given the challenge of picking up as much money as possible in a single minute, using only your hands. What strategy would you use to maximize your payoff?

My guess is that you would leave the coins where they lay and gather up as many bills as you could.

EXERCISE:

What activities do you step over daily, in order to pick up or pursue the lower value, “shiny objects” that take up a considerable portion of your day? How can you pass up the dimes of life and go for the dollars that can make life even more worthwhile?

“A Teacher Affects…”

Posted on April 23, 2015 by Barry

“A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops.”

—Henry Brooks Adams, American historian and member of the Adams political family

Photo from Flickr by Anne Adrian

Among the core values explored and discussed with my clients is their fundamental desire and passion to contribute to the lives of others.

When we examine the wide variety of roles each of them play in their professional and personal worlds, the opportunities seem limitless.

Who are the teachers, mentors, coaches, and other life supporters who have made the biggest difference in your life? Where have you noticed yourself “paying forward” valuable lessons to those whom you care about?

EXERCISE:

Where and with whom can you share your knowledge, wisdom, and life lessons to influence the lives of others, and more fully realize your unique contribution to eternity?

“Nobody ever drowned in his own sweat.”

Posted on April 22, 2015 by Barry

“Nobody ever drowned in his own sweat.”

—Ann Landers, Chicago Sun-Times Advice Columnist

Photo from Flickr by Venture Minimalists

The “Fountain of Youth” is a spring that supposedly restores the youth of anyone who drinks or bathes in its waters. The legend became particularly prominent in the 16th century, attached to the Spanish explorer Juan Ponce de Leon’s travels in what is now Florida.

In an April 2014 Time Magazine article titled, “9 Secrets to Living Longer,” author Alexandra Sifferlin points out that good, old-fashioned work plays a critical role in not only the quantity but also the quality of life.

EXERCISE:

Consider working up a bit of a sweat and adding to the length of your life by…

Working out and doing some form of exercise daily
Working on your diet – you are what you eat
Working on your relationships
Engaging fully in vocation and avocational activities that you enjoy and that will make a difference in the world
Working on your mind by participating in life-long learning

Please reply to this post with some of your own sweat-inducing activities that make your life more rewarding.

“My Sun Sets to Rise Again.”

Posted on April 21, 2015 by Barry

“My sun sets to rise again.”

—Robert Browning, English poet and playwright

Photo from Flickr by Tomas Penalver

A student named Julio, asked to interpret Browning’s quote, said, “The sun sets to lay to rest what is done, and rises to give way to what is to come.”

That this quote begins with the word “my” causes me to focus within, to examine and reflect on the experience of my day, as well as the level of initiative I bring to it as I bound out of bed in the morning.

I find Julio’s interpretation beautiful and poetic. I also feel that Browning was challenging each of us to play a more active role in manifesting each day to the best of our abilities. He asks us to bask in the satisfaction of being an integral part of the rhythmic flow of our lives and the world.

EXERCISE:

Spend a few morning and evening minutes in thought, to capture your intention for the day to come, and reflections on the day that is done.

“If time were to take on…”

Posted on April 20, 2015 by Barry

“If time were to take on human form, would she be your task master or freedom fighter?”

—Richie Norton, author, entrepreneur, strategic advisor

Photo from Flickr by Gioia De Antoniis

Each of has the same 24-hours in our day. Some view this “life capital” from a constraining, scarcity perspective, thinking there is never enough. This often reflects on their attitudes and their level of fulfillment and engagement.

Others view time with an attitude of abundance. They champion and make the most of every moment, fully embracing the gifts each day can bring.

EXERCISE:

What adjustments can you make to your views about time to become more of a “freedom fighter” and less of the “taskmaster”?

“Your mind is for having…”

Posted on April 17, 2015 by Barry

“Your mind is for having ideas, not holding them.”

—David Allen, American productivity consultant & author

Among the books I recommend most often to clients who are challenged with managing their professional and personal time is Getting Things Done by David Allen.

One of the critical insights I derived from his work was the idea that too many people use their minds and memories to hold too much information. It turns out that doing so makes most of us far less productive and also causes overwhelming feelings and considerable stress. Perhaps that is why the subtitle of this valuable book is “the art of stress-free productivity.”

EXERCISE:

Please pick up and study Getting Things Done, and do whatever you can to “have” ideas, but “hold” them in memory-keeping or commitment-keeping technologies, where they will be available to you in the moments you plan to work on them.

“sometimes you win…”

Posted on April 16, 2015 by Barry

“Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn.”

-John Maxwell, American author, speaker, and pastor

One of my favorite books by John Maxwell, which I hope you will consider reading, is The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth.

John has been a pioneer in the fields of leadership and coaching for many years. Today, at age 68, he is doing his best work ever, by building an enterprise that trains and coaches trainers, coaches, and speakers from around the world.

Who doesn’t want to win in life? Who would prefer not to lose?

One of the characteristics I most admire about John is his passion for his own growth and development. He definitely walks the talk daily, in his life-long learning adventure.

EXERCISE:

How can you pursue winning today in all your efforts, and even if you fall, make sure you pick up the lesson on your way up?

“Managers light a fire…”

Posted on April 15, 2015 by Barry

“Managers light a fire under people. Leaders light a fire in people.”

—Kathy Austin, Management Consultant

Photo from freehdw.com

Leadership and Management are two of the most highly valued skills necessary to be truly effective in our professional and personal lives.

I feel strongly that these skills, along with masterful communications and effective supportive coaching, are the four legs of the solid foundation of soft skills that support our success.

When asked, most professionals usually view leadership as the more “evolved” and enlightened of the two, in that leadership involves the articulation of an inspired future for an individual or group. Conversely, management—particularly old-school management—is perceived as pushy, aggressive, and often domineering, in order to achieve desired results.

I’d suggest that they can actually work together in an empowered way with inspired leadership as a foundation for effective alignment and a desirable form of self-management. This involves the individual or group sharing a strong commitment with the leaders, willingly promising to give and keep their word to take the actions necessary for eventual success.

EXERCISE:

How can you develop and master inspired leadership and empowering management capacities to move yourself and others forward, professionally and personally?