Given the importance of relationships to maximize the benefits of the coaching process, we were “all ears and all in,” seeking greater mastery for ourselves and our clients.
If you are a student of Gray’s work, it is pretty apparent that many men have a limited attention span in certain conversations, and almost always seek to solve or fix problems even when the other party has made no request of them to do so.
Where and with whom would seeking to understand others better make a significant difference in both your professional and personal relationships?
“What would happen if you doubled down on service?”
—Robert Richman, keynote speaker and culture architect
Image from Unsplash by Square
Did you know that it takes 5-7 times the effort and resources to obtain new customers than to keep existing customers?
With this statistic in mind, how much effort have you and your organization focused on new customer acquisition rather than making sure your current customers are delighted with you, your products, and of course, your level of service?
Customer loyalty is worth billions, however, we often slack off on our best behaviors once we close the deal. Much like when we say our “I Do” to our life partners. Given the divorce rate of about 50%, we all can see the need to maintain and more appropriately improve these relationships if they are to prosper.
What are some ways you can and will double down on your levels of service in your professional and personal communities? What would be the value of the loyalty generated?
Where do you stand on the two words of today’s quote?
More specifically, where do you stand as it relates to the following communities:
Your organization or place of employment
Your city, state, country
The upcoming 2020 census
The world and all global citizens
The plants and animals that share our earth
As a boy, I attended Creighton Elementary School in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. One of my fellow students was Kim Sledge of the singing group, Sister Sledge, who became pretty famous for their hit song, “We are Family.”
Where can and will an “everybody matters” family approach to your various communities improve your world? What difference could this make to improve our planet if we all treated each other this way?
Research has shown that a critical component to a purposeful, happy life is helping others.
Consider how you currently help others in your personal and professional communities.
What contribution and difference have you made at this point in your life?
Each day, we allocate our time and energies. At some point we run out of gas and need a recharge. Beyond our own efforts to efficiently use these resources, how might you leverage yourself to make a ten-times or 100-times impact?
“It’s hard to see your own face without a mirror.”
—Phil McGraw, American TV Personality “Dr. Phil”
Image from Unsplash by Laurenz Kleinheider
I recently facilitated a team-building workshop with one of my favorite clients. Half of the twelve participants had worked with me before. The other six were with me for the first time. The senior leader has been coaching each of them for more than a decade and he wanted to boost his efforts with this session.
We discussed a variety of topics, and did a strength/weakness exercise, which is fairly standard for such meetings. Surprisingly, the feedback and comments from their colleagues made an even bigger impression on the participants than most expected.
Where are or could you more fully use the people in your personal and professional communities as a mirror, to realize more of your fullest potential?
“Professional is not a label you give yourself. It’s a description you hope others will apply to you.”
—David Maister, former Harvard Business School professor
If you say something positive about yourself, it is referred to as bragging. If others say similar things about you, it is considered the truth.
What do the people at work and in your career efforts have to say about you? How are you perceived and how do these perceptions compare and contrast from your own?
What would you like others to say and how do your words and deeds warrant such acknowledgment and praise?
Seek feedback from a small group of trusted colleagues. Let them reveal the unique abilities, superpowers, and best qualities they see in you. Ask them also about your weaknesses, and the limiting blind spots that may be holding you back from the professional levels you desire.
Thank them for their candid and generous perspective, and promise to act on their wise council.
For extra credit, consider a similar exercise with family and friends.
Feel free to reply to this post to let me know what you discover and how it impacts your life.
“To give of yourself is much more important than giving a gift you can buy.”
—Steve Wozniak, Co-Founder of Apple, Inc.
WARNING! There will be a test at the end of this post!
Gary Chapman’s book, The Five Love Languages, has sold over 12 million copies and has been a #1 New York Times best seller for over 8 years. It has received over 14,000 reviews on Amazon, with 94% being 5 or 4 stars. And given its universal appeal to people around the world, it has been translated into 50 languages. The five languages are:
Words of Affirmation
Acts of Service
Please note that only one out of the five languages is about gifts, and a subset are hand-made rather than bought.
How and in what additional ways can you more fully give of yourself to demonstrate your love of family, friends and others you care about?
Please consider taking the Five Love Languages test and share this expertise with those closest to you to discover their love preferences.
“When people are like each other, they tend to like each other.”
—Tony Robbins, American author, philanthropist and life coach
Image from the Jane Goodall Collection
Did you know that humans and chimpanzees share about 96 percent of the same DNA? Perhaps this is why we enjoy documentaries on these special creatures. When we observe them, we see numerous ways we are alike, such as in the care and nurturing of baby chimps.
Regarding human-to-human interactions, we often operate out of the Birds of a Feather Flock Together idea. At the same time, we can be very focused on where and how we differ as reasons to avoid, dislike, and even hate one another.
How would looking for the similarities and common characteristics and traits of others be the source of more friendships and closer communities in your world?