Tag Archives: Barry Demp Coaching

“I would like to die on Mars, just not on impact.”

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“I would like to die on Mars, just not on impact.”

—Elon Musk, CEO, at Tesla and at SpaceX

Image from Unsplash by Nicolas Lobos

Elon Musk probably lives by the credo “No Risk, No Reward.” He has clearly pushed the boundaries of entrepreneurship to their limits, and in many cases, come out on top. Although financial success is used on many occasions to demonstrate achievement, Musk’s shoot-for-the stars approach almost always focuses on making a difference and leaving a contributing dent in the universe.

Clearly venturing into space safely and reaching the red planet in one piece is pretty high on his list.

Exercise:

What impact do you wish to make with your personal and professional life? How can you more courageously go where you’ve never been before to explore and reach new levels of your potential?

What is the level of your listening?  Who in your life deserves your very best efforts, in which you listen for what is said and not said?

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What is the level of your listening?  Who in your life deserves your very best efforts, in which you listen for what is said and not said?

—Calm App Reflection

Image from Unsplash by austin distel

Do you consider yourself a good listener? Why or why not?

My listening skills have improved considerably since I began my meditation practice. The people I am with take on greater importance and I do my best to make them the complete center of my attention.

Showing sincere interest, listening carefully, and letting them fully express themselves are my chief aims in each interaction.

EXERCISE:

What is the level of your listening? How can you go even deeper in your most important relationships?

 

Friday Review: Generosity

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Friday Review: GENEROSITY

How can and will you demonstrate a generous spirit over the coming months? Here are a few related posts you may have missed.

“Ideas, bread, and books are all the same. They’re better when they are shared.”

 

 

 

“Run marathons in the footwear of others.”

 

 

 

“Be frugal and generous.”

 

 

 

 

What if in skipping the pain, I was missing the lessons

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“What if in skipping the pain, I was missing the lessons?”

—Glennon Doyle Melton, American author and activist

Image from Amazon

One of my favorite poets is Mark Nepo. I am reading his brilliant volume, The Book of Awakening for the third time.

My first read was almost 10 years ago, just after the passing of my mother, Rose. Upon subsequent readings, I have come to realize just how many of his life lessons came out of a variety of painful points in his life including a very serious bout of fighting cancer.

The past two years have introduced us all to many painful experiences. What learning can you embrace from your pain and perhaps even the pain others experienced in your various communities?

Exercise:

Consider awakening to the lessons you may have missed by exploring Mark’s book for yourself.

The glass ceiling doesn’t apply when you’re building your own house

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“The glass ceiling doesn’t apply when you’re building your own house.”

—Heidi Roizen, American Venture Capitalist and Entrepreneur

Image from Unsplash by Kyle Brinker

Did you know that if you place a bunch of fleas in a jar with a glass lid they will eventually stop trying to jump out even if you remove the lid?

Glass ceilings — and ceilings in general — seem to be a fact of life where the world and even we, ourselves, place limits on how high and how far we can soar.

What do some of these limitations sound like when you hear them from family members, friends, colleagues and even your own inner voice?

In recent years, people have pursued their own personal and professional paths, cleared of many of these ceilings, letting new horizons and sunnier futures of their own creation occur.

EXERCISE:

Where in your worlds are you limited by glass ceilings?

How can you courageously break through these barriers to have a custom-made house, built just for you?

“If you don’t understand what makes people tick, they won’t tick.”

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“If you don’t understand what makes people tick, they won’t tick.”

—Robert Swan — British explorer & the first person to walk to both Poles

Image from Unsplash by Anne Nygård

Ever since I can remember I’ve been fascinated by how things work. I distinctly recall, as a child, taking apart a Baby Ben alarm clock to see what was inside that made it tick.

These days, I’m far more interested in what makes the people around me tick, to better discover how to improve my relationships, understand their motivations, and to help bring out their best through my coaching efforts.

Although there are multitudes of tools and assessments to help in this process, I’ve found the simple but often not easy work of collaborative conversations — where seeking to understand and be sincerely interested — works best.

EXERCISE:

How masterful are you in the art of dialogue and conversation?  Where and with whom would greater skill and practice help you understand what make these people tick even better?

Make a plan to create and savor more downtime. Discover and experience where less is often more.

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Make a plan to create and savor more downtime. Discover and experience where less is often more.

—Calm App Reflection

Image from Unsplash by Kelly Sikkema

What will you contemplate or savor during your next downtime?

Learn to press the pause buttons of life, to cherish and savor these quiet moments — reflect and contemplate your life.

Examine the richness and abundance all around you, and develop an attitude of profound gratitude for the wondrous miracles that surround us.

When we unplug and pause, new things begin.

EXERCISE:

What will you do to carve out more downtime in the days ahead?

How can you more fully experience pauses in your days to savor the richness and beauty of these special moments?

 

Friday Review: Intention

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FRIDAY REVIEW: INTENTION

What intentions have you set for your day, your week, or your life? Here are a few related posts you may have missed.

 

“Sit. Or stand. But never wobble.”

 

 

“Intent reveals desire. Action reveals commitment.”

 

 

 

“Setting your intentions is like drawing an arrow from the quiver of your heart.”

 

 

 

“A party without cake is just a meeting.”

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“A party without cake is just a meeting.”

—Julia Child, 20th Century American cooking teacher, author, and TV personality

Image from Unsplash by Caitlyn de Wild

How many meetings do you attend each day? How many of them are in person or over some form of technology?

How would you rate your experience of these events in terms of both productivity and enjoyment?

If you are like many of us the title of Patrick Lencioni’s classic book, Death by Meeting may sum up a good majority of your feelings.

Today more than ever companies are looking to attract, retain, and excite their team members, and the old ways of doing things by just offering competitive compensation and reasonable benefits won’t cut it in the long run.

EXERCISE:

How can and will you pursue a work environment with more of a celebratory and engaging culture?

Please don’t forget the cake!

“Behind every criticism is a veiled wish.”

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“Behind every criticism is a veiled wish.”

—Esther Perel, Belgian psychotherapist

Image from Unsplash by ahi ismail

How do you feel when you are criticized?

How often is your immediate response to defend yourself or perhaps go on the offense and attack others?

Explore a few recent interactions in which you were criticized for something you did or didn’t do.

Dig deeper into the thoughts and emotions of that person to see if there was a hidden desire or veiled wish below their barbed message. What did they secretly want that was not communicated in an acceptable way?

How might you shift your perspective and translate the harshness of their words into simple requests that would have a higher probability of acceptance?

EXERCISE:

A few books that can help your relationship skills are Fierce Conversations by Susan Scott, Crucial Conversations, and Crucial Confrontations.

Please send an email to barry@dempcoaching.com or reply to this post with your email address and I will be pleased to send you a copy of my one page Communication Toolbox.